


Hold On (Don’t Let Me Go)

by snarfette



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-02
Updated: 2014-07-06
Packaged: 2018-02-03 03:28:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 36,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1729457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snarfette/pseuds/snarfette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a post-apocalyptic world, ‘The City’ was supposed to be a safe-haven. But for those that didn’t ‘fit in’, it was just a prison that they were desperate to escape. Unfortunately, leaving ‘The City’ was the ultimate act of defiance that could not go unpunished.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own any member of One Direction. I am not making any money from the writing of this story. The events here have never happened (which is pretty obvious) and never will happen.
> 
> If anyone is familiar with My Chemical Romance’s Danger Days era you will probably understand where I got my inspiration for this story from. It has taken over my thoughts for quite some time but I have enjoyed writing it so I’m hoping you enjoy reading it. Feedback is always appreciated. 
> 
> I’m posting the Prologue and the first chapter together as the prologue is just setting the scene for the rest of the story.

In The City you lived by the rules. If you didn’t, if you were slightly out of the ordinary or behaved in any way that wasn’t ‘normal’, you would be ‘corrected’. You were _made_ to fit into what was expected of you; otherwise you had no purpose. If there was no hope for you, if you couldn’t be moulded into a useful member of society you were locked up indefinitely; never to be seen again.

***

After the bombs had fallen, the world had been chaotic. People had lived in constant fear for their lives and had given up hope of any sort of future. But eventually someone had taken charge. A safe-haven had been constructed amongst the rubble of the world and the survivors had flocked through the gates to live in the utopia that was promised to them.

And it had been wonderful – at first.

After a while, those in charge became power mad. They revelled in the control they held over the masses and used their position to dictate how people lived and what they could do. Anybody who dared to challenge the order of things was quickly removed from society and ‘corrected’. Those who were left behind quickly learned to keep their mouths shut and live by the laws of The City.

That had been many years ago. There weren’t many left now who could remember what life was like before the bombs or before The City. The people who lived there now were mostly happy to abide by the rules and live their perfectly normal lives in peace. Most of the citizens would never dream of risking the prospect of ‘correction’ so they had become well-behaved robots who followed the letter of the law without question.

Of course, most of the people that lived in The City had never stepped foot beyond its protective walls. Every child that grew up there was raised on stories of the horrors that they would face if they ever had to go to The Outside. They didn’t actually _know_ what was on the other side of the barriers; they just blindly believed the stories that they had heard. They believed the propaganda that was created to keep them in line, the propaganda that was used to keep them in The City. Stories of a desolate, cut-throat world, full of criminals and monsters, beyond the walls of The City helped to keep the people obedient. Nobody would want to leave the safety of The City because what awaited them on The Outside wasn’t worth considering.

Every so often, The City’s only authorised newspaper would report the story that someone had been removed for ‘correction’. The faces of those unfortunate souls would be plastered across the front page with the sensationalised reasons for why they had been taken. This always caused much consternation and much condemnation among the people. That person’s face would appear on posters neatly displayed on the side of buildings to act as a constant reminder of the consequences of stepping out of line.

Sometimes those that didn’t quite ‘fit-in’ just disappeared overnight. The ‘lucky’ ones were ‘corrected’ by the authorities and given a useful purpose within society. The others were locked away for the rest of their lives.

But sometimes, people simply chose to leave of their own accord. They didn’t want to live the controlled life that was laid out before them and they knew that they never could. They didn’t care what might be waiting for them on The Outside; anything had to be better than having their lives dictated by The City. Those people still ended up with their names in the paper and their faces on a wall. They became hunted by the authorities. No-one was allowed to just _leave_ The City; that kind of behaviour was unacceptable and questioned the power of the authorities. Who knew what sort of dangerous activities people like that were capable of? They couldn’t be _allowed_ to get away with it. They couldn’t be allowed to be a threat.   

Living on The Outside didn’t mean that you were free from The City.      


	2. Chapter 1

The first time Louis had ‘met’ Liam, Harry and Zayn there had been the usual suspicions between them. No-one that had left The City trusted anyone at first. Trust and respect had to be earned.

Louis’ path had crossed with theirs several times until at one point he and Liam had both accused the other of spying. What might have become an angry exchange was interrupted by the arrival of a carload of City agents. Louis immediately jumped onto his stolen motorbike to leave, while the others rushed to their car and did the same.

Turning back once he thought he was safe, he realised the agents had gone after the car. Of course they would; there were three wanted men in that vehicle. He also realised that the agents were not alone. Two motorbikes had joined the chase and he suddenly felt a strange urge to assist the other Outsiders in their escape. Maybe he was crazy; he certainly felt like he was. He had no reason to help them, he didn’t owe them anything but he couldn’t fight the feeling that he _should_ help them and without even realising it, he had turned his bike around and was racing after them.

Gunfire exploded from the vehicles across the mostly deserted streets but the men in the car were totally outnumbered. Louis began to think his plan to help was pointless and that he would never catch up with the fight but suddenly the fleeing car turned sharply to the right. He knew that he could cut diagonally across the rough terrain of a long-abandoned park and join up with them so he accelerated harder to get the last bit of power he could from the bike.

It didn’t take long before he found himself closing in on the agents’ car. One of the motorbikes had already been removed from the chase as its front tyre had been shot and it had been sent spinning off in a cloud of dust. Glancing ahead at the car, Louis saw the curly-haired one hanging out of the front window, gun in hand, staring at him as the car sped on. Maybe he had reached the conclusion that the stranger was indeed a spy as he rode practically alongside the agents’ car. Louis was going to prove them wrong about that little theory.

Pulling up beside the car, he turned his head to look at the occupants. The agents sitting on the left-hand side of the vehicle turned to look at him and Louis wondered for a moment if they were surprised to see him. He smiled brightly and waved but before they seemed to register what was happening he threw a little round object through the open window and into the lap of the agent in the passenger seat. With that, he turned his bike away from the car as sharply as he dared and accelerated hard. He was counting loudly and when he reached ‘seven’ (he didn’t know why he’d picked seven, it just seemed like a good idea) he turned his head back to watch the explosion that ripped through the car. The car rolled on for a few more metres before it could move no further as the flames engulfed it. 

Smiling widely at his success, he turned the bike round again and drove back towards the burning wreckage. He circled around the car once before moving off to inspect the second bike that had crashed a little further away. This time the rider had been shot leaving the bike to come to a grinding halt as it was no longer controlled.

Louis pulled up close-by and jumped off his own motorbike. As he leant closer to examine the damaged bike, he heard the rumbling of a car engine approaching and he stood up straight. One hand rested close to his gun; you couldn’t be too careful out here.

The three men jumped out of their car and walked towards him, still looking a little suspicious. The well-built, brown-haired one was looking at him critically as they stopped on the opposite side of the fallen bike.

“That was…interesting,” he said as he waved his hand in the direction of the still burning car.

“I like to be creative,” Louis replied as he held eye contact.

“Hmm,” was the only sound the other man made in response. He looked deep in thought for a moment before he spoke again. “Can it be fixed?” He was gesturing towards the motorbike that lay on the ground.

“Yeah, sure. It’s not too badly damaged,” Louis answered as he cast a quick glance at the bike. “It won’t take much to get it sorted; you might as well take it.”

“You don’t want it?” the curly-haired man asked.

“Sure, but I don’t have anywhere to take it or any _way_ of taking it, so it’s all yours,” Louis said.

The first man looked at his two comrades - they seemed to be having some sort of silent conversation - before he looked back at Louis. “If we take it back with us, you can come and repair it and then we’ll decide what to do with it.”

Louis tried not to let the surprise show on his face. Were these people actually _inviting_ him to go with them? There was no question that he was going to accept the offer. Something had drawn him to ride after them earlier and now something was drawing him to them again. Not only that but he had been roaming The Outside for a long time on his own and the thought of company was pretty appealing even if it was only for a short time. He didn’t want to look too keen to agree so he merely shrugged slightly and nodded, “Sure.”

“Fine. I’m Liam,” the man announced suddenly, “and you are?”

“Louis.”

“This is Zayn and Harry,” Liam said as he indicated the two other men.

Harry stuck out his hand and shook Louis’ firmly as he greeted him with a broad smile. Zayn narrowed his eyes slightly suspiciously but eventually nodded in greeting.

 “The bike should be okay to go a short distance before it pisses all of its fuel away, so can any of you ride it?” Louis asked the three men.

Without speaking Harry turned and walked back to the car. He reached into the back and pulled out a black crash helmet. As he made his way back towards the group, he gave Liam a long, meaningful look before he pulled the helmet on. He lifted the bike and swung his leg across it. The bike spluttered to life on the second attempt and then he waited patiently for the others to get ready to continue their journey.

For the briefest moment, Louis wondered if he was making a mistake as he started his bike. What if this was some sort of trap? Then he pushed the doubts to the side. For the longest time he had been living by his wits and trusting his instincts and right now every fibre of his being was telling him that he was making the right decision.

***

It seemed that Louis was right to trust his instincts. He had followed the others back to their base (which was a long-abandoned family house) that day and had been living there ever since. That had been weeks ago, not that anyone really kept track of the time on The Outside, and the bike had been easily repaired as Louis had guessed it would be. After he had fixed it, he thought that he would be asked to leave but the others seemed quite happy to let him stay and he was in no hurry to move on.

Louis had actually settled into life with them remarkably easily; he just felt like he belonged there somehow. He felt like he was developing good relationships with Harry and Zayn, who were both interested in his fascinating ability to create explosive devices.

There was only Liam who didn’t seem to have warmed to him at all. It was bizarre really, seeing as Liam had invited him to go with them in the first place, but ever since he had arrived at the base, Liam had kept his distance. Louis tried his usual charm and humour and smiles to win him over but they all failed as Liam usually just ignored him or provided one-syllable responses to his questions. Louis found it incredibly frustrating especially as he thought they actually had a lot in common. He had watched Liam repair radios and machinery and strip down guns with such skill and precision that he desperately wanted to talk to him about it but found no easy way to start a conversation.

Louis thought he knew what the problem was. Liam thought he was dangerous, impetuous and reckless; he obviously thought that the addition of Louis to the group was going to end badly. Louis could understand why he might have made those assumptions but he was still pissed to think that someone had judged him so quickly. He knew he could be a little impulsive sometimes but he actually preferred to think of it as being spontaneous. The way that Louis had dealt with agents and carried out tasks whilst he had been with the group reflected his ‘spontaneous’ style but he knew his actions left a look of disbelief and slight annoyance on Liam’s otherwise emotionless face.

Louis wasn’t impressed by the cold shoulder he was receiving undeservedly, so he decided to just steer clear of Liam as much as possible. If he wanted to be an unfriendly arsehole, Louis didn’t have much time for him.

The tension between Louis and Liam didn’t seem to upset anyone else. The others seemed to turn a blind eye to the problem although Louis was pretty sure that he’d overheard Zayn, Harry and Liam talking about him one evening. He wasn’t sure about the details but he definitely heard his name. At first he had worried that Liam was suggesting to the others that they should kick him out but when nothing was said the next day he didn’t think about it again.

Louis felt like he had earned the respect of the group the day he had helped them escape the agents but he knew trust was something that had to be worked on. It had taken a long time but Louis felt like he’d finally got there when Harry told him about their friend on the inside of The City. Louis had been totally caught off guard by the information but felt a great swell of happiness at the same time. Of course he had eagerly asked for more details and Harry had filled him in on their friend Niall who was ‘working’ for the authorities in The City but acting as their spy and informant the whole time. Zayn had joined in the conversation and suddenly Louis felt like he was part of a rather odd little family.

The only problem was Liam, who obviously cared a great deal about the others but remained completely distant when it came to Louis.

“Don’t worry about Li,” Harry said one day as they sat inside their base.

Louis looked at him questioningly. “Who says I’m worrying about him?”

“No-one,” Harry answered easily. “Just, I know he’s…quiet. He does a lot of thinking.”

“Yeah, thinking of reasons why he hates me,” Louis grumbled as he shovelled a spoonful of beans into his mouth.

“He doesn’t hate you,” Harry replied. “He just likes to make his mind up about people in his own time. He needs more time to trust people. He’s always been the same.”

“How long have you known him?” Louis asked.

Despite odd details, Louis didn’t know all that much about the time that Harry had spent out on The Outside. He had a feeling that there was some deeper connection between Harry and Liam; they shared these knowing looks and held hushed conversations.

Harry looked at him steadily for a long time. It was like he was making a decision about what he should tell Louis. “I knew him long before we were out here. He was my best friend at school.”

Despite having an inkling of some close bond between the two men Louis was still surprised. “Oh,” was all he managed to say as he thought about what Harry had revealed. Having friends like that seemed like such a distant memory to Louis. He hadn’t really encountered anyone that was that close to another person outside of The City; not that people would announce it to a stranger anyway. Yet here he was with this odd little group, being told that two of the members were life-long friends. They were so closely tied to one another – he almost felt jealous that he had no-one so close to him.

“I’m sure he’ll come round eventually,” Harry interrupted his thoughts before he pushed himself up and wandered outside.

***

Even though Louis had repaired the damaged motorbike weeks ago, he had spent a lot of time fiddling with it. He wanted to improve it and make it _their_ bike. After a lot of work he decided he was happy with it but now, in his mind, he faced something much more difficult.

Louis was chewing the inside of his lip as he entered the house. He wasn’t entirely sure why he felt so apprehensive about what he was about to do. As he walked in, he saw Liam sitting at the table with an old radio in pieces in front of him. Striding towards the table he swallowed thickly as he stood before Liam who didn’t even lift his eyes from what he was doing.

Louis cleared his throat before saying, “Um…could you just come outside with me for a minute?”

Slowly Liam looked up at Louis and blinked a few times before he responded. “Why?”

“I just need to…I need you to look at something for me.” Louis couldn’t understand why he was finding it so difficult to communicate with the other man. He wasn’t some shy, quiet type who couldn’t hold a conversation. Actually, he could talk to _anybody_ about _anything_ – well anybody except Liam as it turned out. He had tried to strike up conversations with him previously and always found it a fruitless exercise so had pretty much given up. Now he just felt kind of awkward around the other man and he couldn’t explain why.

Liam looked at him with a raised eyebrow before he pushed himself up from his seat and stood waiting for Louis to lead the way. After a momentary hesitation, Louis turned around and walked back through the door with Liam a few paces behind.

Standing close to the base was the repaired motorbike and Louis walked around it to face Liam.

“It’s all fixed and ready to go,” Louis said as he waved his hand above the bike. “I’ve made a few alterations but nothing too drastic.”

Liam remained standing on the opposite side of the bike with his arms folded across his broad chest. He didn’t say anything as he looked at Louis questioningly.

Louis blew out a slightly frustrated breath. “It’s all yours,” he said.

The questioning look on Liam’s face didn’t disappear but his face screwed up slightly in response to Louis’ words. “What are you talking about?”

“The bike,” Louis said slowly. “I spoke to Harry…I spoke to him about what he thought we should do with it and we decided that you might as well have it seeing as you know how to ride but you don’t have a bike of your own.”

There was still a look of slight doubt on Liam’s face as Louis finished explaining.

“You should probably test it out. See if it suits you,” Louis suggested.

“Sure,” Liam replied simply. He turned around, disappeared into the base for a moment and returned with his crash helmet in place. Louis watched as he straddled the bike and started it up, then he turned his head to the side to avoid the cloud of dust that the bike’s rear wheel kicked up as Liam accelerated away.

Smiling slightly as he watched the bike and its rider get further away, Louis found himself desperately hoping that Liam would be happy with it. He wasn’t sure why it mattered so much.

Eventually, the bike reappeared from the other side of the base and Louis felt his stomach flip a little as Liam pulled up beside him. Liam cut the engine and pulled his helmet off to reveal the most genuinely happy expression Louis had ever seen on the other man’s face.

“How is it?” Louis asked.

Liam smiled at him. “It’s great,” he replied brightly, before he swung his leg across the bike and wandered back into their base.

***

After presenting Liam with the bike and seeing that he actually liked it, Louis felt a little easier in the other man’s presence. He was still pretty sure that Liam didn’t like him very much but he hoped that they’d made a little progress.

It seemed that Louis spent a lot of time working on the group’s vehicles. Life on The Outside was hard for everyone and _everything_. The beat-up old Ford they drove seemed to suffer the most. Of course it was the most practical vehicle and it seemed to get thrashed about (by Harry) the most.

Yet again, Louis was leaning over the engine with his hands out of sight as he tried to find the source of the latest problem with the car. He was pretty sure he was close to solving the issue when he lost his footing on the wet ground and slipped. He fell forwards against the engine and hissed in pain and annoyance as he felt the skin on his lower arm tear against sharp metal. Pulling his arm away from the engine carefully, he saw a jagged cut running down the side of his forearm from his wrist to about halfway along his arm. There was blood oozing from the wound already and as he lifted his arm to inspect it closer a warm red line dribbled down and dripped off his elbow. “Shit,” he cursed loudly as he turned around and headed into the building.

Holding his arm up to slow some of the blood flow, Louis entered the house and headed straight for the box of medical supplies that the group kept. It wasn’t exactly well-stocked but it held enough to deal with the most common injuries that they might encounter.

Cleaning the cut was relatively easy but creating a bandage to wrap around it to avoid infections was much harder than Louis had expected. He growled in frustration as he struggled to manoeuvre the bandage into position.

“Need a hand?” he heard from behind him and he spun around immediately. He came face to face with Liam who was looking at him with a slightly amused look on his face.

“What did you do?” he asked as he gestured towards Louis’ now-bleeding-again arm.

“I slipped while I was working on the fucking car,” Louis explained. “I can’t get the bandage on – I never was any good at first aid.”

Liam nodded slightly in understanding. “Sit down. I’ll take a look at it for you.”

At first Louis didn’t move. He just stared at Liam wondering why he was suddenly offering to help him. Realising that the offer might pass him by if he didn’t accept it, he quickly moved to sit at a table.

Liam followed him with a fresh bandage and sat down opposite him. He signalled that Louis should show him his arm and slowly Louis moved his injured limb towards him. Liam took hold of his arm with a surprisingly gentle grip and inspected the wound before he set about cleaning it up again.

For a while Louis watched as Liam carefully treated his arm but then his eyes drifted up and focused on the top of the other man’s head as he leant over his arm. He was caught up in thinking about why the other man was being decent to him and wondering whether his hair was as soft as it looked when Liam suddenly spoke.

“So, Harry told me that it was your idea to give me the bike,” he said as he paused in his actions for a moment and looked up. His eyes locked with Louis’ and Louis felt his cheeks heat a little at being caught staring.

“Um…well, yeah, I guess it was,” he managed to reply.

“Why did you think I should have it?” Liam asked as he began wrapping the new bandage around Louis’ arm.

“I dunno,” Louis said. “Like I said, you can ride. I thought you’d like it.”

Liam nodded once. “I do. It’s great. Thank you Louis.”

Louis was a little surprised by the gratitude but didn’t want the conversation to slip into strained silence so he blurted out, “How come you’re so good at this stuff?”

Liam looked at him steadily for a moment before he finished tying the bandage securely in place. “Someone around here has to be. Someone has to fix Haz when he gets himself into scrapes. And it looks like I’ll have to do the same for you now too.” He slowly released his hold on Louis’ arm. “Okay. You’re all done.” he said eventually.

Louis smiled slightly. ‘ _Finally, some progress,’_ he thought. He lifted his arm and inspected the neat bandage that encircled it. “Good job,” he said. “Thanks Liam.” He pushed himself out of his chair and headed for the door.

“You’re welcome,” he heard from behind him. Louis grinned to himself before he turned around and gave the other man a nod before heading back out to work on the car.    

***

Finally being on better terms with all of the members of the group, meant that Louis felt like he really belonged with them. There had been a tiny nagging doubt in the back of his mind since he had followed them back to their base that day. He had felt a connection to the gang of outcasts since he had met them but he had worried that the situation wouldn’t last. His concerns were caused by Liam’s rather frosty treatment of him; he was convinced that he would be told to leave and never come back or maybe murdered one day because Liam didn’t like him (dramatic yes, but Louis was always one for thinking of all possible scenarios). But now that Liam had finally opened up to him a little and seemed to accept him, he felt that he could truly relax in the company of the men – not that anyone ever truly relaxed on The Outside.

Although he was more comfortable with the gang, Louis still found that Liam wasn’t _entirely_ friendly towards him. He knew that the other man still thought he was too much of a risk-taker. He often caught the look of disbelief and – was it anxiety? - that was sent in his direction.

Louis couldn’t seem to understand what the problem was. If Liam didn’t like the way that he got things done why didn’t he just come out and say it? It couldn’t have been concern for Louis’ well-being that was causing the problem, seeing as Liam didn’t seem to like him all that much and Louis was pretty sure that he wouldn’t care if he lived or died. Maybe he was just worried that Louis might lead the rest of them into danger with his ‘reckless’ attitude. Louis didn’t know for sure. All he knew was that Liam didn’t seem to want to spend much time around him and every time he got into an ‘exhilarating’ (as Louis thought of it) situation he seemed to receive even more of a cold shoulder.  

Liam keeping his distance only served to make Louis all the more keen to get to know him. There was just something about the mysterious, brooding man that Louis couldn’t figure out but he desperately wanted to.

***

The group had stopped at an abandoned fuel station to make the most of the shelter from the sudden rain that had set in and see if there was anything worth salvaging. The majority of places on The Outside had either been destroyed by the bombs or looted in the chaos that followed however it was always worth investigating as you never knew what you might find. They were always on the lookout for spare parts or something that they could trade or even another base that they could set-up as a bolt-hole if they ever needed it. The Ford was parked at the rear of the station hidden from the road that ran past the front of the building.

As usual, Louis’ inquisitive nature had led him away from the rest of the group. While they explored inside the building with Liam keeping watch at the front, he had gone to investigate the area outside the building. For some reason he could never manage to stay in one place and just sit still – just another reason why he didn’t belong in The City.

Louis was busy examining a vending machine, wondering how someone had got everything out of it without breaking the glass, when he felt a presence beside him. His first reaction was to reach for his gun but when he realised it was Liam his hand dropped again.

“We need to leave,” Liam told him quietly. He looked serious – even more so than usual.

“What’s going on?” Louis asked as he held his stare.

“Agents,” Liam answered simply, “coming in from the east. The others have already gone to the car, I came to get you.”

For a fleeting moment Louis felt a swell of happiness that Liam had come to warn him but he didn’t have time to dwell on it.

“Come on,” Liam said before he quickly made his way around the side of the building leading Louis towards the vehicle.

They were nearly there when Louis suddenly stopped in his tracks. “Wait, did someone get my jacket?”

Liam’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion. “What?” he asked as he shook his head.

“My jacket,” Louis repeated, “I left it inside.” He turned back towards the rear door of the station. He was stopped by a hand on his shoulder.

“What are you doing?” Liam asked in bewilderment.

“Going to get my jacket,” Louis told him like it was obvious. “You go to the car. I’ll catch up.” With that he turned around quickly and disappeared through the door.

For a moment Liam was left staring at the spot where Louis had been standing with wide eyes. He could hardly believe what had just happened.

Louis ran into the station and immediately saw his jacket draped over the counter where he had left it. He managed to grab it and sink down behind the counter just as the front door of the old station swung open on corroded hinges. Breathing as quietly as he could although his adrenaline was racing, he listened to heavy footsteps entering.

The agents were sure to search the whole station; he couldn’t stay hidden where he was for long. There was no chance of him sneaking out of either of the exits without being noticed. There was only one option, he would have to shoot his way out and hope the agents were caught off guard for long enough to let him escape. He peered around the side of the counter and watched as four City soldiers scanned the area with their almost inhuman eyes. He quickly moved back to lean against the counter and sucked in a deep breath. It had to be now; he had to move while he had the element of surprise.

Pulling his gun out of its holster, he held it tightly and closed his eyes for a moment. He released a long breath before he pushed himself up quickly and turned around to fire at the agents. After hitting one square in the chest immediately, Louis fired again but he saw the others drawing their weapons and aiming at him. It was still three against one but Louis kept shooting. He knew where his escape route was but his chances of making it were slim as the three agents began firing at him. Aiming once more, he hit one of them in the arm before he had to dive out of the way of a bullet that flew past his head. He was momentarily safe behind the barrier of the counter but he knew the remaining agents would be closing in on him. Again he prepared himself to face the enemy but as he jumped up from behind the counter for the second time he realised he was no longer alone in his fight. Another set of shots were flying towards the agents and from the corner of his eye Louis saw the muscular figure of Liam firing at them.

It took just a few moments for the fight to be over. The remaining agents were eliminated and Louis grinned at their success. Turning to face Liam to thank him for his assistance, he saw a look of anger and incredulity etched across his face. He was about to speak when Zayn appeared at the door.

“We need to get out of here _now_ ,” he ordered, “there’s a vehicle approaching which probably means more agents on their way.”

Liam turned away from Louis immediately and stalked out of the building. Louis hesitated for just a moment as he watched him go. He could tell that Liam was furious just by the way he walked. He didn’t have time to think about it now. Instead he ran out of the building and jumped into the back of the Ford.

As they sped away from the station, Louis wondered if anyone else was aware of the tension in the vehicle. Liam was staring resolutely out of the window as the car flew along; he obviously wasn’t in the mood for speaking to anyone. Louis could see the tense line of his jaw from his position behind him in the car.

Tearing his eyes away from staring at Liam, Louis looked up and met Harry’s eyes in the rear-view mirror. For a moment he thought he was in everyone’s bad-books but then Harry’s eyebrow quirked at him, he smiled knowingly and looked back at the road. Louis didn’t know what the hell was going on but he didn’t think that now was a good time to ask.

When the Ford roared back to the house the group piled out quickly. It seemed that they _were_ all aware of the bubbling tension and seemed to know it was about to explode. Harry and Zayn didn’t want to be around when it did.

Liam stomped towards the base and disappeared from sight. Deciding he needed to get to the bottom of what was going on, Louis followed him. Harry and Zayn shared a look before settling down on the mismatched patio chairs outside the front of the house.

Louis walked into the house to find Liam standing with his back to the door. He swallowed thickly before he spoke. “What’s up?”

Liam spun around and fixed him with an angry glare. “ _What’s up?_ ” he echoed. “What the hell did you think you were doing?”

There was confusion clearly displayed on Louis’ face as he looked at him. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about that ridiculous stunt you pulled back there,” Liam yelled at him as he waved his hand in the direction they had come from. “What the hell were you thinking going back to get your fucking jacket?”

“I _like_ that jacket,” Louis replied simply.

“Are you fucking crazy? You put yourself in danger like that for a _jacket_ , _”_ Liam shook his head in disbelief.

“It’s hard to find decent clothes these days, you know,” Louis retorted. He was beginning to get pissed off by the way he was being spoken to. “Besides, I never asked you to help me,”  

“What did you want me to do? Just leave you there?” Liam asked angrily.

“I’m surprised you didn’t, seeing as you don’t exactly like me,” Louis replied bitterly.

For a moment Liam seemed lost for words, his mouth opened and closed a few times but he couldn’t seem to find the right thing to say. Eventually he just settled on saying, “I wasn’t going to leave you there to get killed.”

Louis snorted lightly at the words. “I’m sure I’d have survived. I’ve been in worse situations than that and always made it out without any help.”

“It’s nice to know you’re so grateful,” Liam growled. “Maybe I _should_ have just left you to it.”

“Like I said, I never asked you to help me. Why do you even care so much anyway?” Louis replied.

“I…I…you’re part of this team and we’re supposed to look out for each other,” Liam managed to say. He wasn’t looking at Louis anymore and seemed to be struggling to say what he really meant.

“I’m sure you wouldn’t be that bothered if something happened to me. You’ve not exactly welcomed me with open arms. How about next time you just keep your nose out of my business?”

Immediately, Liam’s eyes snapped back to glare at Louis. “You are completely infuriating.”

“ _I’m_ infuriating? You’re the one that spends most of your time ignoring me and acting like you hate me, then you go to the effort of helping me and actually get pissed at _me_ for it. If you don’t like me, just say so and I’ll keep out of your way and you can go back to acting like you’ve got a stick shoved up your arse,” Louis snapped.

Suddenly, Liam took a few steps closer to Louis. There was something burning in his eyes as he stared him down but Louis wasn’t sure what it was. It wasn’t the same anger that he had seen before but Louis was still sure that he was about to get punched in the face and prepared himself for a fight.

For a moment nothing happened. Neither of them moved as they breathed heavily and stared at one another. Eventually, Louis couldn’t bear the silence anymore. “If you’re going to hit me just get on with it.”

Liam’s eyes narrowed and he lurched forwards quickly. His hand raised and Louis only had a split-second to realise that it wasn’t clenched into a fist before it was twisted in his hair and his head was pulled forward. Before he truly understood what was happening he felt lips against his, kissing him fiercely. It certainly wasn’t what he had been expecting but he didn’t want to do anything other than kiss back. Liam’s hand was still twisted in his hair and he tightened his hold as Louis pushed back against him kissing him with equal intensity.

Without breaking their kiss, Liam pushed Louis backwards until his back collided with the wall roughly. The jolt caused Louis’ teeth to catch against Liam’s lip and he tasted blood in his mouth but still they didn’t stop kissing. Liam’s hand moved out of Louis’ hair and down his shoulders as he pulled the jacket that had been the cause of their argument down his arms. It fell to the floor as Louis pushed against Liam and began walking him backwards across the room towards the stairs. They moved with a sense of urgency and Liam nearly stumbled several times as he kept his lips attached to the smaller man’s as he was pushed along.

Eventually, they made their way to Liam’s room and it was Louis’ turn to remove Liam’s jacket. He pulled it away from him swiftly, growling lowly as the sleeves got stuck around his wrists. With a harsh tug and some wriggling from Liam the clothing was discarded.    

Next t-shirts were stripped away. Both of them drew in sharp breaths as warm fingers brushed against heated skin. Liam managed to turn them around and pushed Louis down onto his mattress before he straddled his hips. He trailed his lips down to suck at the tender flesh of Louis’ neck as his fingers worked on removing his belt. Louis moaned loudly as Liam’s fingers slipped beneath the waistband of his jeans and rubbed his cock firmly. He arched up to the touch revelling in the feeling of someone else’s hand pleasuring him rather than his own. His fingernails dragged against the flesh of Liam’s back causing him to hiss loudly and draw back from his attention on Louis’ neck. He looked at Louis hungrily with dark eyes for a moment before he crashed their lips together once more.

The brief pause had given Louis a moment to gather his thoughts. One minute they had been yelling at each other and the next they were kissing. It was pretty crazy even by Louis’ standards and he wasn’t entirely sure what was going on in Liam’s head. Did Liam actually like him or was he just taking out his frustrations in a different way? Was this his way of taking control of Louis? It didn’t really matter in that moment. All Louis knew was that he didn’t want it to stop. It had suddenly dawned on him that he thought Liam was the most beautiful person he had ever seen and he was totally lost in the feeling of his lips pressed against his.

Allowing himself to become completely lost in the moment, Louis’ fingers worked on unfastening Liam’s jeans. He pushed the stiff material past his hips before mirroring the action of Liam’s hand and stroking him firmly through the thin material of his boxers.

Groaning at the sensation, Liam pulled his lips away from Louis’ and found himself panting heavily with each stroke. He stared down at Louis’ sweaty face for a long time before he forced himself to speak.

“Stop,” he grunted as he reached down to still Louis’ hand. “Not like this – I need more than this.”

The words seemed to hold so much meaning yet he hated how desperate they were. It was true though, he did want more than just this.

Louis held his gaze for a moment as he tried to read the meaning behind the words in Liam’s eyes. Something was telling him that this was about more than just sex but he almost didn’t dare believe it. He lifted his hand and stroked the side of Liam’s face tenderly. It was a moment of unexpected gentleness in their previously frantic encounter.

Pushing himself up on his elbows so he could lean close to Liam’s ear he whispered, “If you need more, you’d better take it.”

Liam’s eyes widened slightly at the words but he didn’t take any more encouragement. He pushed Louis back down and, with a little help, pulled his underwear down his legs. He traced his fingertips across Louis’ lips before he commanded, “Suck.”

Louis opened his mouth willingly and licked the tips of the fingers before Liam pushed them in further. A low groan rumbled somewhere in Liam’s throat as Louis’ tongue swirled around his fingers. Settling on his knees between Louis’ legs, Liam pulled his fingers away from the smaller man’s mouth before leaning down to kiss him passionately again.

Louis wanted this more than anything he’d wanted in a long time and tried his best to relax but he still found himself shocked when he felt Liam’s finger pushing inside of him. For all the rushed and frenzied actions of minutes ago, Liam wanted to take his time to prepare Louis as best as he could.

Somewhere between his lust-filled thoughts, Louis vaguely pondered whether any of the ransacked shops on The Outside might still have lube, but then Liam moved his finger carefully and added a second causing Louis to shudder slightly beneath him and open his mouth in a silent moan. Gently opening and closing his fingers, it didn’t take long before Liam had Louis crying out in pleasure with his hips bucking up and down. Liam couldn’t wait anymore and it didn’t seem like Louis wanted to either. He pulled his fingers away causing a moan of disappointment to fall from Louis’ lips. Spitting into his hand, Liam rubbed his own cock and coated it with makeshift lube as best as he could. He lifted Louis’ legs and wrapped them around his waist before lining himself up and pushing forward. He slid into his lover slowly, trying to keep control of himself as he was surrounded by wonderful heat and pressure.

Louis drew in a sharp breath at being filled so completely then shifted a little to find a more comfortable position. Liam moved at a slow pace, driving in and out carefully until he felt a tight squeeze at his upper arms and heard a loud moan from Louis. Leaning forward Liam captured Louis’ lips in a searing kiss before grinding his hips into him harder and faster.

Louis was as vocal as ever as he cursed and moaned loudly. Even Liam, who had been so quiet before, seemed lost in the moment as groans and expletives fell from his lips as he thrust into Louis’ body. Reaching down, he wrapped his hand around Louis’ cock and began pumping it firmly, revelling in the way Louis had become a shuddering mess from his touch. A wave of heat began to pass through his body as his hips moved forwards again. Looking at Louis’ pleasured face, Liam felt his orgasm take over. Shaking as it washed over him, he managed to continue moving his hips as he rode it out, hearing Louis reach his own climax loudly. Louis was still writhing beneath him as he came down from his high.

Slightly pulling away from the man beneath him, Liam collapsed onto the old mattress beside him.

Louis looked across at him as he drew in deep breaths and tried to calm his racing heartbeat. He half expected Liam to jump up, pull his clothes on and stomp out angrily or, worse still, grab him and throw him out the door but Liam simply turned his head to make eye contact with Louis. He looked almost anxious as he looked at Louis.

Neither of them spoke for a while as they continued to gaze at each other. It was Louis that finally had to speak. “Was that what you wanted?”

Liam blinked rapidly a few times and drew in a deep breath. “Yes,” he replied simply.

“ _Why_?” Louis asked quietly. “I thought you didn’t like me.”

“You thought wrong,” Liam said equally as quietly. “I…I never hated you Lou. When we first met you I didn’t trust you but then after a while I guess I was…well I think I was afraid of you.”

“ _Afraid_?” Louis asked in disbelief. “But why?”

“I was afraid because I _liked_ you. You _know_ how dangerous this world is and how much harder it makes things if you care about anyone or anything except yourself. I’ve already got Haz and Zayn, and to some extent Niall, to worry about and I couldn’t stand the thought of having someone else I cared about being at risk out here. I thought that if I held you at arm’s length it would be better for both of us. But I guess that plan failed.” He smiled weakly before he looked away.

Louis reached out his hand and stroked the side of Liam’s face as he had before. “You shouldn’t have been afraid, Liam. It’s not a curse having people to care about, who care about you in return. You’re so lucky having people who love you in this God-forsaken world. Don’t deny yourself what will make you happy.”

Liam’s eyes had lifted to look at Louis as he spoke. He felt somehow reassured by the words. He smiled a more genuine smile as he looked at Louis.

“Would it help if I promised to do less ‘crazy’ things?” Louis asked in mock seriousness.

Liam actually chuckled lowly. “I don’t think it would be fair of me to expect that. Besides as much as it bothers me it’s one of the things I like about you.”

Louis’ eyebrows rose. “Hmm, how about you explain some more things you like about me,” he laughed as he leant closer to Liam and kissed him firmly.

***

Sitting outside the house, Harry and Zayn were trying to avoid thoughts of what was going on inside.

 “Do you think they’re still arguing?” Harry asked eventually.

 “I doubt they’re still going at it,” Zayn answered as he took a long drag of his cigarette.

Harry smirked. “Actually, I reckon that’s exactly what they’re doing,” he drawled.

Zayn choked on a laugh before rolling his eyes. “Fuck, I hope so. I can’t take much more of the sexual tension.”

“If they haven’t made _friends_ after this, we’ll lock them in a room somewhere until they stop being so fucking oblivious,” Harry told him with a grin.


	3. Chapter 2

Life on The Outside went on as it always had. Louis and Liam hadn’t made any announcement of their new relationship but it was obvious to their friends. The once tense atmosphere between them had disappeared and been replaced by easy banter, fond glances and a desire to be close most of the time.

It was easy for Harry and Zayn to see the change and they welcomed it. While he was happy for them, Harry had lectured Liam about being careful and given Louis a stern talking to about not hurting his ‘oldest friend’. Louis might have laughed and told him that Liam could easily take care of himself if Harry hadn’t looked quite so serious.

It was Niall who asked the question that seemed to confirm their relationship with a simple kind of summary on one of his covert meetings with them near The City.

“So, shall we call you two _best_ friends now?” he asked with a broad smile as he studied the two of them sitting beside each other with their thighs touching.

Liam chuckled a little. “I guess you could say that.” He glanced at Louis and grinned widely before turning his attention back to Niall.

Niall nodded once and seemed totally accepting of the situation before he continued filling them in on news from inside The City.

“Best friends,” Louis whispered as he pressed himself against Liam in bed that night, “I like that.” He kissed Liam softly before pulling away to smile fondly at him.

***

Despite being at ease together at their base, both Liam and Louis were well aware that their relationship had to remain secret when they were away from the house. There were plenty of people in the world that would willingly take advantage of a close bond or connection between two people. They couldn’t afford for anyone else to know about their relationship; it would be too easy for their enemies to use it against them.

It was fairly easy to keep it secret when they were on The Outside or on a supply run. They were so focused on the task at hand that there wasn’t time for thinking about anything else. Even so, both of them found that they were instinctively keeping an eye on the other whenever they were away from the base. It just seemed to become second-nature.

There was no room in the world for grand gestures or declarations of undying love but, after some time, something within Louis told him that he loved Liam and Liam loved him in return. They didn’t say the words out loud. Maybe they were both afraid to say them and _hear_ them. Loving someone had the potential to put them in danger and they were already faced with enough of that every day.

Louis knew though that he loved Liam and would do anything for him. The thought of anything happening to Liam was almost too much to bear but at the same time it was a frightening daily reality. He promised himself that as long as he was breathing he would do whatever it took to look out for Liam. He didn’t know, because they had never spoken about it, but Liam had promised himself the exact same thing.

***

Oddly enough, they all enjoyed going back to The City. Maybe it was the thrill of sneaking back in or maybe it was just the giant ‘fuck you’ they felt it sent to the authorities in The City.

Every so often, the group had to make trips to gather much needed supplies; ‘shopping’ as Harry called it, except they never actually paid for anything. Using inside information relayed to them by Niall, they would sneak into The City, usually in the middle of the night, and collect what they needed. Food, basic medicines, equipment necessary for repairing the various items they used on The Outside were all on the ‘shopping list’.

They would meet up with Niall on these occasions and the blonde man was always so happy to see them. He filled them in on the comings and goings inside The City and passed on the information they needed to ensure that their visit ran smoothly.

Niall was incredibly good at what he did. He had been their spy for a long time and while they sometimes worried about him being alone in The City, the others knew that they would be lost without his updates and leaked information. That didn’t stop them all wishing that all five of them could just disappear to The Outside and never look back every time they parted ways.

On one of their visits, they had just exited a store with their bags full of necessary provisions when Zayn suddenly wandered across the road. He paused in front of the wall of a building before shrugging his bag off his shoulders and rummaging through it. Within seconds he was upright again and facing the wall but now his hand was moving rapidly against the surface. The others wandered up behind him to see what he was up to and immediately had to stifle their laughter.

Neatly arranged on the wall were several posters with the faces of some of those that had ‘rebelled’ against The City staring out from them. Each poster displayed the photograph, name and ‘criminal number’ of the individual. This wasn’t the first time that any of them had seen the posters but it was the first time that they had seen them with the extra details that Zayn was now adding. Zayn’s hand was scribbling across the poster-faces of all four of them, adding glasses, moustaches and horribly realistic looking scars. When he was finished, he tagged his work and stepped back to admire it.

The others all praised him, commenting on what a big improvement it was before they decided it was time to get going. They wondered how long it would be before the posters were replaced but it was still fun to know that in the morning there would be some seriously scandalised City folk and some seriously pissed off authorities questioning how such a thing could have happened.  

***

“How did you end up out here?” Louis asked as he rested his head against Liam’s chest as they lay in bed together.

Liam drew in a deep breath and blew it out slowly. Stories of how people had ended up on The Outside were often closely guarded; sometimes traumatic, sometimes too heart-wrenching to relive, sometimes just part of a person’s past that they wanted to forget. He gently pushed Louis off his chest and pulled himself up so that he could lean against the headboard. “It wasn’t anything horrific,” he began eventually, “not like some people’s experiences. It was my choice to leave.”

Louis looked at him expectantly but didn’t interrupt.

“When we were kids,” Liam continued, “Harry didn’t seem to fit in. He was full of strange ideas and he just didn’t seem to know how to filter what came out of his mouth. It was fine when we were kids but as we got older people started looking at him and saying things about him. People started to really notice that he wasn’t like all of the other City robots. Harry seemed pretty oblivious to it all really.” Liam chuckled a little at that and Louis smiled fondly too. “But I knew that things were going to change and I thought that eventually they would take him away. I knew that if they tried, I’d have to help him; I was prepared to run away with him to The Outside.

I had always kept my head down; tried to do my best at school. But when Harry’s your best mate, it’s hard to stay off the radar completely.

I was sent to the Head’s office at school one day with a message and while I was in there I saw Harry’s name on a file. I can remember trying to read it upside down but the word ‘correction’ was as clear as anything I could ever remember seeing. I wasn’t some naïve child who didn’t know what they did to people when they ‘corrected’ them. They were going to take him away but not just to put him in prison, they were going to lock him up and torture him and pump his body full of their sick, mind-altering drugs until they _made_ him fit in.”

Louis drew in a sharp breath in sheer horror at the thought of something like that happening to Harry. It was the stuff of nightmares. He grasped Liam’s hand and squeezed it tightly, needing to remind himself that they were all okay as much as to reassure Liam.

Liam seemed to relax a little from the tense position he had adopted while he was recounting his story. “That night, Harry and I left. We couldn’t wait another day and risk them coming for him. So, we packed what we could manage and ran away in the middle of the night. We couldn’t even say goodbye to our families.”

Liam paused and Louis rubbed the back of his hand with his thumb as he looked at him in concern. Smiling weakly, Liam continued speaking.

“We wandered around for the longest time, wondering what the hell we were going to do. We were just kids really; scared and inexperienced and alone in this place that we’d been taught to fear. But eventually we found a place to call our own and we set-up camp.

Then one day, this guy started drawing all over our fucking wall and we had to give him a bit of a talking too.” Liam was smiling properly now. “We took him in and he’s been working on the décor ever since. And then…then there was you. You kind of forced your way into our lives and…well now I can’t imagine you not being around.” His smile had become softer now, almost shy, as he looked down at their hands still clasped together.

Louis lifted their joined hands to his lips and kissed the knuckles of Liam’s hand gently. “I’m not going anywhere,” he said quietly.

Liam smiled again as their eyes met once more.

After a long moment, Louis spoke again. “Well, I guess you’ve shown me yours, so now I’ll show you mine.”

“You don’t have to,” Liam said seriously. “I don’t want you to if you’re not comfortable.”

Louis chuckled a little. “Such a sweetheart,” he said as he kissed Liam’s hand once more before lowering their hands back to the bed. “But really, there’s not much to it so it’s hardly worth keeping it a secret. I was a bit of a _bad_ boy,” he said with a cheeky wink at Liam. “I was always in trouble, in school and out of it. I was the class clown and the one who always seemed to take things too far. Amongst various other complaints about me, apparently I had an unhealthy interest in explosions. I have absolutely no idea where they got that idea from. It was either the day I blew up a bin at school or the collection of stuff they found under my bed,” Louis said with a casual shrug of innocence.

“To be honest, I’m amazed that they didn’t take me away long before they eventually decided that enough was enough. Anyway, one day I was in my room and the doorbell rang. Next thing I knew, there were agents downstairs and I could hear my mum begging them not to take me for correction. I heard them say that I was going to be taken to prison; they didn’t want to correct me – I was beyond that and not worth the effort apparently. So, I ran. I climbed out of my bedroom window and ran as fast as I could to get the hell away from them. I knew I had no choice, I couldn’t go back and I wouldn’t be safe anywhere in The City so I kept running until I made it to The Outside. And that’s about it really.” Louis shrugged his shoulders slightly once he reached the end of his story, as though he didn’t really know what else there was for him to say.

Pulling him close, Liam kissed the top of his head fondly. “You’ll always be worth the effort as far as I’m concerned,” he whispered against Louis’ hair.

Louis smiled softly at Liam’s sweetness.

“And for the record,” Liam continued, “I have a bit of a thing for bad boys, especially ones who are obsessed with blowing stuff up.”

The soft smile on Louis’ face stretched into a smirk as he licked his lips. “Blowing stuff up isn’t my only talent you know,” he drawled as he leaned closer to Liam again, “I’m pretty good at blowing in general if you’d like a demonstration.”

Liam looked like he was considering the suggestion for a moment. “I have _heard_ good things so maybe a practical demonstration would help as confirmation.”

With his fingers already hooked into the waistband of Liam’s underwear, Louis just nodded confidently before wriggling the garment away from Liam’s hips, glad to be distracted from serious and depressing thoughts about their pasts.

***

Supply runs were not limited to clandestine visits to The City. Often the group would set out to explore the areas left abandoned after the survivors had fled to the safety of The City. After a long time of picking over the places close-by (along with any other Outsiders who had travelled into the area) they had been forced to venture further afield for their foraging and often split up in order to cover more ground.

Harry and Louis had taken the bikes (after a lecture from Liam to Harry about not trashing his) and had travelled for several miles away from the base. They were making the most of the deserted streets: enjoying their freedom, racing along and cutting each other up.

Ultimately, their mission wasn’t for playing about though so eventually they pulled up outside a row of silent shops and hopped off their bikes, before pushing them down an alleyway out of sight. They were immediately on their guard knowing that danger was everywhere in these situations. They might come across an agent patrol from The City or another group of Outsiders who might not welcome being disturbed or, and Louis was deadly serious about this, they might find themselves hunted by a pack of wild animals. Harry had looked rather sceptical about such a theory but Louis had pointed at the overgrown plants covering the buildings and abandoned cars and told him that ‘nature was taking over’ in the absence of humans.

With their guns in hand, they approached the first store in the row and peered through the filthy windows. It looked pretty ransacked. There had been a lot of looting in the months after the bombs had fallen as people struggled to survive in a frightening new world and after people moved to The City, the Outsiders had continued taking what they could in order to make it through.

They wandered further along the street, looking through windows and smashed doorways finding most places fairly empty. There were a few bits and pieces that they picked up and stowed into their backpacks but nothing worth getting excited about.

Thinking that the shops had been a bit of a waste of time, they were surprised to find a clothing store which looked surprisingly intact. There had obviously been several things removed but there was also a lot of stock remaining and they almost couldn’t believe their luck.

It was that which made Harry hesitate at the doorway as Louis slipped inside. “Don’t you think it’s a bit too good to be true?” he asked as Louis turned back to see why he wasn’t following.

Louis looked around at the store and the surrounding area. “Maybe,” he said eventually. “But imagine Zayn and Li’s faces when we get back with a load of new clothes to wear. It’d be so good to replace some of our shitty stuff. Plus, I’d kill for some new pants.” He smirked and quirked his eyebrow but Harry still hesitated.

Louis sighed, “You can stay out here if you want – keep watch if you’d feel better. _But_ I can’t guarantee I’ll pick out something in your size or in a shade that’ll bring out your eyes for that matter.”

Harry finally grinned at Louis’ comments and shook his head, giving in to the temptation of going through the stuff in the shop. Louis just returned his grin as he draped his arm across Harry’s shoulders and steered him inside.

Originally, they had planned on running inside, grabbing what they could and getting out of there but when it became apparent that they hadn’t wandered into a trap and they weren’t disturbed after several minutes of looking around, they had started to be more selective about what they picked up. They had a limited amount of space to carry the clothes in their backpacks so they decided to go through the stuff more carefully. And as Louis had pointed out, they could always return to the store with the car if they wanted to.

Harry was in the middle of rolling up a leather jacket for Zayn and squeezing it into his bag when a sound outside the shop drew his attention. He looked up sharply from what he was doing, pausing in his actions and peered out of the windows of the shop. There was nothing there but he still felt the hairs on the back of his neck rise. Maybe it was just some debris blowing around in the breeze. With one last look outside, he turned back to the bag.

It was only a few seconds later, that Louis jumped over the table next to him and landed softly beside him. Harry jumped at his sudden arrival but Louis immediately held his finger to his lips to stop him speaking. Gesturing to a cracked mirror fixed to a pillar nearby, Louis drew Harry’s attention to why he wanted him to be silent. They could see the reflection of three heavily armed agents approaching the front of the shop.

There was no way that they could escape the shop via the door they had entered without a fight now and they had no way of knowing if there were more agents outside.

Louis cursed himself for his foolishness and for getting carried away by the excitement of the well-stocked shop because they hadn’t checked their available exits when they had entered. Liam’s constant warnings about always being aware of their surroundings and never entering a place without knowing how you were going to get out were bouncing around in his head as he looked into Harry’s wide eyes.

It was Louis’ fault that they were in this situation and he was going to make sure they got out of it. Louis signalled to Harry to keep low and began crawling between the clothing rails and tables in the shop. After what seemed like a long time creeping along, Louis saw what he was looking for - a green exit sign hanging above a door. Turning around to check on Harry, Louis caught sight of the agents entering the shop cautiously with their weapons already in their hands. He pointed at the doorway quickly and they both scurried towards it. As they got closer, they could see that the door was hanging off its hinge at the top but when they reached it, the door wouldn’t move. Something outside the shop must have been blocking it, leaving only a small gap for them to squeeze through.

“Haz, you go first and I’ll cover you,” Louis told him immediately.

Harry looked like he was going to argue but Louis just pushed him towards the door. “Go, we don’t have time,” he hissed desperately.

Harry threw their backpacks through the gap first then braced his hands against the door and its frame and pushed himself up to squeeze through.

Louis’ eyes tracked the steady movement of the agents through the shop, ready to shoot at them if they caught sight of Harry wiggling out of the door.

Harry was nearly through when the rusty door moved ever so slightly under his weight and a screech of metal rang through the otherwise quiet shop. The agents eyes immediately snapped in the direction of the sound and landed on Louis standing in front of the door way.

Harry was outside now and he desperately began pushing the overflowing wheelie-bins away from the door. The sound of shots being fired inside the shop spurred him on and eventually he could pull the door open further.

“Lou!” he shouted through the gap. “Come on!”

Louis’ grateful face appeared at the doorway and he began squeezing himself through the gap between the two doors as Harry fired shots towards the agents over the top of his head. Just as Louis was nearly out, his lower leg caught on a jagged piece of rusty metal sticking out of the door and he cried out in pain. He fell the rest of the way out of the door before Harry grabbed him, and their backpacks, and helped him limp away as fast as they could.

They moved as quickly as possible towards where the bikes were hidden, looking over their shoulders the whole time to see if they were being followed, and jumped on to them. Louis winced as he started his bike but couldn’t dwell on it as they tore away from the shops in a cloud of dust.

When they were far away from the scene and sure that they had left the agents behind, they slowed down and rode alongside one another.

“You alright Haz?” Louis called as he looked over at his friend.

“Fine,” Harry replied with a smile, “You? Did you hurt your leg?”

Louis shook his head slightly, “Nah, just a scratch – nothing serious. Look, I’m sorry about that. I talked you into it; we wouldn’t have been in there if it wasn’t for me.”

Harry raised his eyebrows at him, “Shut up Lou, what’s life without a few scrapes? Besides we still managed to get the clothes out.”

Louis laughed a little at that. “True. Listen, can we not mention what happened to Liam when we get back? You know what he’s like. He’ll just get all stressed out and he’ll give us a lecture about being more careful.”

Frowning slightly, Harry looked unsure; he didn’t like lying to Liam.

“Come on Haz,” Louis cajoled “he’ll be so pissed at me for getting you into that situation. And then he won’t let us go out without him for the rest of our lives.”

Harry chewed his lower lip momentarily before he nodded his agreement. “I guess you’re right, but I’m not good at lying to him.”

“It’s not a lie,” Louis told him simply, “We’ll just leave out the part about getting trapped in the shop.”

Harry grudgingly agreed and they continued their journey back to the base.

When they arrived, Liam and Zayn were outside looking at the car engine. Louis and Harry pulled up and Harry jumped off his bike easily. Louis climbed down more gingerly as his leg felt sore but he plastered a bright smile on his face as he approached the other two men.

When Liam asked if they’d been successful, Louis launched into the story about finding the shop and proceeded to pull out various garments from his backpack, smiling encouragingly when Harry joined in. Liam and Zayn were more than a little impressed by their scavenging and Louis muttered to Harry that the whole thing was more than worth it when Zayn’s face lit-up upon seeing the jacket that Harry had brought him.

That evening, they were all in good spirits, enthused by Harry and Louis’ gifts. It wasn’t until Louis slipped away that he had chance to look at his injured leg. It had been throbbing mercilessly and he carefully peeled his jeans away to inspect it. The wound on his calf was long and jagged, it was deeper in the middle and still bleeding slowly. He rinsed it off before bandaging it tightly and pulling on a clean pair of jeans. He’d have to keep it covered to prevent Liam from seeing it and asking what had happened.

It wasn’t that Louis _wanted_ to lie to Liam. It was just that he felt stupid. He knew that Liam would be mad at him, not only for endangering himself but also for putting Harry in that situation. Deep down, he knew that Liam would only react in that way because he cared so much and he didn’t want anything to happen to them but he just felt like this was the latest thing that would confirm to Liam that Louis was reckless and a danger to them all. Louis was scared that one day Liam would just say enough was enough and that they couldn’t risk keeping him around anymore because he was always doing something perilous. So Louis was happy to keep his injury a secret and deal with it by himself. Liam didn’t need to be worried about it and maybe, he thought, it was his punishment for being so reckless.   

***

“Are you alright Lou?” Liam asked as he sat beside him as they ate their supper.

“I’m fine,” Louis mumbled, although his quiet response seemed to highlight the fact that he wasn’t actually fine at all.

Liam frowned as he took in Louis’ pale face and the dark, bruise-like circles under his eyes. “You don’t look too good and you’ve been really quiet today” he said as he placed his hand against Louis’ forehead. “Shit, you’re burning up,” he added as he rubbed his back soothingly.

The only response Louis made was to shrug. He didn’t feel well at all. He’d had a headache all day and despite Liam telling him his skin felt hot, he couldn’t stop his body shivering from the chills that passed through him.

By now, Harry and Zayn were both staring at Louis across the table with looks of concern but their expressions were nothing compared to the worry evident on Liam’s face.

“Do you think it’s a cold? Or maybe the flu,” Zayn suggested.

Louis wrapped his arms around his shivering frame as Liam hummed thoughtfully.

“I think we’d better get you to bed,” Liam decided as he stood up and held out his hand.

Louis looked at it for a moment before taking it to allow Liam to help him up. As he stood up, he felt a wave of dizziness wash over him and he wobbled on his feet. If it wasn’t for Liam’s strong arm wrapping around his waist, he would have ended up on the floor.

Casting a worried look at Zayn and Harry, which they reflected back at him, Liam began guiding Louis away to their bedroom.

Once Liam had settled Louis in bed and wrapped him in blankets to fight off the cold he felt, he perched on the edge of the bed and stroked his hair away from his face gently. Louis’ eyes drifted shut at the feeling and Liam thought he had fallen asleep but then his eyes snapped open again. It took him a moment before he focused on Liam but when he did he looked confused. “Tell my mum I’m not going today,” he said suddenly.

“What?” Liam asked in total shock and utter confusion.

“My mum,” Louis said as his eyes travelled to the door. “She’ll be ready for work and waiting for me so she can give me a lift but I’m not going in today.”

Liam stroked his hand down Louis’ cheek gently and chewed his lip agitatedly. “Louis, look at me. Do you know where you are?”

Louis’ eyes drifted back to Liam’s face and he blinked a few times before he answered. “Of course I do. We’re in our bedroom. I’m so tired, love,” he almost whispered the last part.

“Okay, Lou,” Liam leant forward and placed a soft kiss to Louis’ burning forehead. “I’ll let you sleep now. I’ll be downstairs if you need anything. I’ll come back and check on you in a little while.”

Standing up from the bed, Liam watched as Louis’ eyes fell shut again and this time he did fall asleep. He remained where he was for a while, watching Louis and wondering what he was suffering from. He hoped that it would be something that Louis could just sleep off but he had a horrible worry gnawing at his mind as he eventually made his way back downstairs to Harry and Zayn.

***

Liam had decided to go and sit upstairs with Louis rather than remaining downstairs with the others. There was no point trying to focus on anything when his thoughts were totally absorbed by what was wrong with his partner. He had slipped into the bed beside Louis and eventually fallen into a fretful sleep.

When Liam woke up, it was just beginning to get light outside and he immediately looked over at Louis’ still form. He reached out to feel Louis’ skin to find out whether he still had a high temperature but when his hand touched Louis’ forehead he found his skin was cold and clammy.

Liam sat up immediately and leant over Louis. He called his name a few times, gently at first and then more urgently as Louis showed no sign of responding. Shaking him slightly didn’t wake Louis either and Liam began to panic. He ran out of the room and yelled for Zayn and Harry before rushing back to attempt to bring Louis round. Fortunately, they had all become light sleepers thanks to the constant threat of danger on The Outside so Harry and Zayn came stumbling in not long after.

“What’s wrong?” Zayn asked as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

“He won’t wake up,” Liam told him. “He’s cold and he won’t wake up,” he repeated desperately.

Zayn pushed him out of the way and stooped down next to Louis. He felt Louis’ skin and then reached his hand under the covers to his neck. His eyes widened as he felt Louis’ pulse. “His heart is racing,” he said as he turned to face Liam. “This isn’t just the flu, this is something really serious,” he announced as though the others hadn’t already come to the same conclusion.

“But what?” Liam asked desperately. “What’s wrong with him?” He knew the panic was obvious in his voice but he couldn’t hide the fact that he was terrified.

“It could be an infection, like septicaemia,” Zayn thought out loud.

“Oh no,” Harry suddenly said from behind Liam. His hand was in front of his mouth as both Zayn and Liam looked at him sharply.

It was Harry’s turn to push them both out of the way as he quickly moved to the bed. Without hesitating, he threw the covers off Louis’ body and pulled the leg of his trousers up to the knee. There on Louis’ calf was a bandage covering what looked like a nasty wound. Harry unwound the bandage quickly to reveal the inflamed injury; the skin around it was red and he could feel the heat emanating from it.

Liam drew in a sharp breath at the sight of it before he looked at Harry questioningly.

Harry looked mortified as his eyes flicked between Liam’s enquiring eyes and Louis’ injured leg. “The other day, when we went out on the bikes, we got caught out in the shop…agents trapped us. We had to squeeze out of this rusty doorway and Louis hurt his leg. He said it was nothing, he said it was just a scratch. I didn’t know it was so bad. I’m sorry Liam, I’m so sorry.”

Liam’s mouth flapped open a few times as he looked at Harry in confusion.

“Why didn’t either of you say something?” he asked, a hint of anger seeping into his tone.

Harry shook his head despairingly, “Louis said we shouldn’t mention it. He didn’t want you to worry. He said you’d be angry. But I didn’t know about his leg being that bad. If I’d known, I would have told you – I swear.”

“Fucking hell!” Liam yelled as he grabbed at his own hair and Harry actually flinched. “I can’t believe you both _lied_ to me!”

Harry hung his head as he apologised again.

“It’s a bit late for that. Sorry isn’t going to help him, is it?” Liam spat angrily.

Zayn finally stepped in, seeing Harry close to tears and Liam close to a breakdown. “Yelling isn’t going to help him either,” he said calmly.

Liam turned to him sharply but his eyes showed that he desperately needed Zayn to say something that would bring him hope.

“If it’s septicaemia we can’t treat this with what we have here. We need to get him antibiotics,” Zayn informed them as he inspected the wound on Louis’ leg. “He’ll need a broad-spectrum anti-biotic that we can inject…and there’s no way we’ll find that anywhere other than The City.”

Liam had been expecting as much but he still drew in a sharp breath at the prospect. Usually when they raided The City it was for food or basic medical supplies like bandages but this was something so specific. They could hardly pop into the hospital and ask for what they needed and they wouldn’t find it on the shelf in a shop.

“Then I’ll go to The City,” he said as he locked eyes with Zayn.

Zayn looked at him sceptically, “This isn’t something you can just steal from a shop you know.”

The muscle in Liam’s jaw clenched as he nodded. “I know that,” he said. “But what will happen if I don’t get it?”

Zayn bit his lip and held Liam’s gaze steadily. “From what I know about this sort of thing, his blood pressure will fall - it’ll go so low that it will cause his organs to fail.” He took a deep breath, “He’ll die.”

Liam just nodded stiffly at Zayn’s words. “Then I have no choice,” he said.

“I’m coming with you,” Harry said from beside them.

Liam looked at him sharply but this time Harry held the eye contact. “I’m coming with you,” he repeated firmly. “This is partly my fault so I’m going to help make it right.”

Liam looked like he might argue but Harry cut him off. “Why don’t we get a message to Niall? He could get us what we need and we could arrange a drop-off somewhere inside The City so he doesn’t get caught leaving.”

Liam had to admit that it was a good idea. It would be much easier for Niall to get the medicine rather than try to locate the antibiotics themselves at the same time as trying to stay hidden inside The City. They couldn’t risk the possibility that they would be disturbed before they found what they were looking for. They would only get one chance because if the authorities within The City got wind of a raid on hospital supplies they would ensure heightened security covered all medical centres and then they would stand absolutely no chance of getting in.

“Send a message to Niall,” Liam commanded. “We’re leaving in two hours.”

He turned around and disappeared down the stairs before the others could say anything else.

***

Liam had needed a little time alone to compose himself. He was so angry that Harry and Louis had lied to him but also so terrified that he might lose Louis.

Life on The Outside was hard, there was no escaping that, and people died all the time but Liam had never lost anyone that he cared about and he wasn’t about to let Louis be the first. He was going to get the medicine and he was going to make sure Louis recovered no matter what the cost.

Although he was mad at Harry, that wasn’t the reason why he was unsure about taking him along – he could hardly stand the thought of someone else that he cared about getting hurt or being in danger.

After pulling himself together and psyching himself up for the task ahead of them, he went back to see Louis. He sat beside the bed and gently took hold of Louis’ cold hand. “You’re going to get better Lou,” he said quietly. “ _I’m_ going to make sure you do. And when you wake up I’m going to tell you you’re an idiot and never let you out of my sight ever again.” He tried for a smile but knew it was a poor imitation. “You’re going to be alright, I promise.”

He squeezed Louis’ hand before he stood up, then leant over him. He pressed a soft kiss to Louis’ mouth and cupped his clammy cheek gently. “Don’t go anywhere while I’m gone,” he whispered, “I’m not losing you.”

When he turned around, Zayn was loitering in the doorway.

“Look after him,” Liam said as he walked away from Louis towards the door.

“You know I will,” Zayn replied as he patted Liam on the shoulder.

Liam pulled Zayn into a hug and they both squeezed each other a little tighter than usual.

“Be careful,” Zayn said into his ear.

“Of course,” Liam said as he pulled away. “Just…if something happens to me…just make sure he’s okay.”

Zayn nodded as he swallowed past the lump in his throat. “I’ll see you soon.”

“Yeah,” Liam agreed, “soon.” With that, he walked down the stairs and headed outside.

Harry was already waiting by the car and they both climbed in silently. The engine rumbled to life and Liam drove them out onto the road to start the long journey to The City.

Most of the journey was silent as Harry’s guilt weighed heavily on him and Liam’s worries bounced around inside his head. They were nearly at The City boundaries when Liam finally spoke.

“I’m so mad at you for lying to me,” he said through gritted teeth.

Harry looked over at him with sad eyes. “I know and you have every right to be. It just seemed like the best thing to do at the time. But I know it was stupid looking back at it now.”

Liam sighed deeply, “I understand why you did it you know. I know I worry a lot. I know I’m always telling you to be careful. It’s just that…I can’t stand the thought of losing any of you.”

“I’m so sorry that I didn’t tell you what had happened Li. And now…now Lou’s so ill because of it. And I don’t want him to…to die.” Harry said and he sounded so upset that Liam reached over and squeezed his thigh for reassurance.

“He’s not going to,” Liam said firmly. “I’m not losing any of you. We’re going to help him – together. And even though I’m mad at you, I want you to know that you’re my best friend. If it was you that was hurt, I would do this for you too. We’re all going to get through this. But just promise me that you’ll never lie to me again.”

“I promise,” Harry agreed immediately.

“And promise me, that whatever happens today, you’ll do what I say,” Liam added.

Harry hesitated, he didn’t like how serious that sounded, and Liam looked over at him. “Haz, promise me,” he said.

Harry swallowed thickly before he nodded and quietly replied, “I promise.”

When they finally reached the edge of The City, they left the car concealed in the shadows of the walls and quickly made their way towards one of the many entrances that they used to sneak in and out. This one was a sewage tunnel with a narrow walkway running alongside the drain that allowed just enough room for them to edge along in single file. It wasn’t the most pleasant of passageways but it brought them out in a perfect place to meet Niall. Plus, the exit that opened up deep within The City was ideally located in an alleyway that no-one passing would have given a second glance.

Liam pushed the man-hole cover up slowly before peeking out cautiously. Seeing that, as usual, there was no-one nearby he moved the cover away completely and climbed out, closely followed by Harry. They were painfully aware of the risks that they were taking so, with their nerves more on edge than ever, they carefully made their way towards the arranged meeting place with Niall.

It seemed that the plan was running smoothly. As Liam and Harry arrived at the location, Niall rounded the corner and caught sight of them. He quickly made his way towards them.

“Alright lads,” he said as cheerfully as he could in the circumstances. “How’s Lou?”

Liam cast an assessing look around them before he looked back at Niall. “It’s bad,” he sighed as he ran his hand through his hair. “He needs the antibiotics desperately.”

“Good job I’ve got what he needs then,” Niall told him with a slight frown on his face. He slung his bag off his shoulder and pulled it open to show them what was inside. “A course of broad spectrum antibiotics,” he paused as he looked around a little nervously. “They’re going to notice that this stuff is missing and it won’t take long for that to happen.”

Liam and Harry nodded in understanding and took the bag from Niall. “Thank you Ni. You literally are a life-saver,” Liam told him gratefully.

Niall squeezed his shoulder. “No worries mate. Just get that to him and make sure he gets fixed.”

Before any of them could say anything else, the sound of sirens split the air and the three of them looked at one another with wide eyes.

“Run Niall!” Harry told him immediately.

Giving them a look that told them to be careful, Niall turned and disappeared back the way he had come before Liam and Harry ran in the opposite direction. Glancing back, Liam caught sight of an agent’s car rounding the corner and he knew that they’d been seen.

As they were nearing the entrance of the alleyway, a shot rang out and both Liam and Harry ducked instinctively as they ran.

“Stop!” a voice yelled after them. “By order of The City authorities, you must stop.”

The two of them responded in the same way. They both pulled out their guns and slowed enough to fire in the direction of the voice before they tore round the corner into the alleyway.

Another shot exploded behind them and Liam and Harry threw themselves behind a pile of wooden crates. They were so close to the man-hole cover and their escape route but as they peered out through a gap in the wood they saw that the entrance of the alleyway was filling with armed agents. There was no way that they would make it into the narrow hole without one of them, or probably both, getting hurt.

“You have no choice but to surrender,” one of the agents called out. “Place your weapons on the ground and come out.”

Harry suddenly felt the weight of the bag being draped across his shoulders and he looked up at Liam questioningly. They were both breathing heavily but Liam looked at him steadily.

“You’ve got to take the drugs and get them back to Louis,” he said calmly.

“What?” Harry asked in shock. “What do you mean?”

“Harry, you’ve got to do this. We won’t both make it out. You’re going to go and I’ll hold them back.”

“No,” Harry shook his head. “No, I’m not leaving you here.”

“This is your last chance to come out willingly. We will take you by force if you refuse,” the cold voice called down the alleyway again.

“There’s no choice,” Liam said as he grabbed Harry’s shoulders.

“Then _I’ll_ stay,” Harry said desperately. “It’s my fault – I’ll stay.”

“No,” Liam replied firmly. “Haz, you promised me you’d do what I told you to. I’m telling you, you have to do this for me.”

“Li,” Harry murmured and his eyes were wide.

Liam pulled Harry into a quick embrace. “You’re my best mate Haz,” he said quietly. “Tell Lou…tell him I love him. And look after each other.” He pulled back then. “Now go, Harry.”

Harry didn’t have a chance to say anything else as Liam stood up abruptly and stepped out from behind the crates. Knowing that he had to do what Liam had asked of him, but feeling absolute devastation at the realisation, Harry scurried towards the man-hole on shaking legs.

As Liam walked out from the protection of the crates, the lead agent signalled for his men to advance. As soon as they moved, Liam raised his gun and began firing at them.

Hesitating before he could bring himself to actually leave, Harry took one last look at Liam as he fired at their enemy before slipping into the tunnel with tears in his eyes and the bag of medicine on his back.

Two of the agents crumpled to the ground before they even managed to fire at Liam. But then he felt a sharp pain in his side and he stumbled. He fell onto one knee but refused to stop firing at the agents. He had to give Harry enough time to get away. Liam pointed his gun and fired again. Shot after shot rang out, with Liam knowing that his aim was off thanks to his injury but at least he was keeping them back. Then when he squeezed the trigger, nothing happened and he knew it was over. He angrily threw the now-useless weapon at the nearest agent before slumping forwards onto his other knee and his hands. From the corner of his eye, he saw a shadow fall over him. When he looked to the side, he saw a pair of black-clad legs standing beside him. A crackling sound, followed by a shock of pain in the side of his neck sent him toppling onto his side. As his eyes rolled back in his head, he had just enough time to hope that Harry would be safe and that he would make it back to Louis in time.


	4. Chapter 3

“Liam James Payne.”

A voice broke the silence of the room.

Liam had slowly regained consciousness and had been lying very still with his eyes squeezed shut trying to stop the pounding in his head. When he had first woken up, he had been disorientated. He had looked around the stark brightness of the room he found himself in with squinting eyes as he had turned his head to the side to try to figure out what was going on. A throbbing pain in his side had reminded him that he had been shot and the ache behind his eyes helped him recall the taser shock he’d received once the agents had caught him. Those two things brought the memory flooding back to him and he knew without attempting to move that he was restrained in some sort of interrogation cell within The City.

The voice saying his name had been the first thing that he had heard since he had woken up and he found himself wondering whether he had been alone the whole time or whether some agent had suddenly appeared in the room without him noticing. Either way he forced his eyes open at the sound and glared across the room towards the owner of the voice.

A tall, dark haired man with almost grey eyes, dressed in the uniform of a City agent was standing watching him. His hands were behind his back as he stood perfectly still: ‘like the robot that he is,’ Liam thought to himself.

“My name is Agent Marsh,” the agent spoke again. “I am employed as an agent to enforce the laws of The City.”

Liam didn’t speak. There was no way he was going to engage in conversation with this man.

“You are Liam James Payne, a wanted fugitive. You are now in the custody of The City and I expect your full co-operation. I would like you to tell me everything you can about your actions on The Outside and about your associates,” Agent Marsh told him like it was the simplest request imaginable.

It would have been funny if Liam wasn’t currently strapped onto a bed at the mercy of the man. He wondered what the agent was expecting to get out of him. He certainly wasn’t going to be getting ‘co-operation’. Liam remained silent. He just stared at the agent blankly, blinking slowly a few times.

Agent Marsh hummed softly for a moment before he took a step closer to Liam. He clasped his hands in front of him. “I get the impression that you are not willing to talk to me Liam. Well, how about I talk and you listen?”

Slowly, Agent Marsh began pacing around the bed, keeping his eyes fixed on Liam while Liam tracked his movements warily.

“Liam James Payne,” he began and Liam was getting sick of hearing his own full name being repeated, “A wanted criminal since the age of fifteen. Not a person that the authorities originally had any concerns over. Average attainment at school, no inappropriate behaviour, no outward signs of any radical opinions. A young man destined to become a useful member of our society. The only failing you had was your choice of _friends_.” He almost spat the final word like it was a crime in itself to actually _have_ friends.

“Harry Edward Styles,” he continued and Liam’s eyes narrowed slightly. He didn’t want this City control freak to talk about Harry, he didn’t want them to know anything about his best friend. He almost told Agent Marsh to shut the fuck up but he swallowed his words down; he didn’t want him to see that he’d got a reaction out of him.

“An unusual child: he had some ‘interesting’ ideas that probably could have been dealt with if he’d had the correct guidance and a stricter upbringing. Unfortunately, young people with radical ideas cannot go unchecked and your friend was scheduled to be corrected,” Agent Marsh stopped pacing and he narrowed his eyes at Liam. “It was for his own good obviously. He would have become a valued citizen, a hard worker, a person grateful for the life he had in The City. But, he chose the life of a criminal. I wonder Liam, whose plan was it to run away? I wonder, which one of you thought you would be better off living on The Outside as fugitives?”

Again Liam wanted to yell at him, tell him that they _were_ better off, that their lives were happy and, despite the dangers, The Outside felt more comfortable than The City ever had. But again he remained silent.

“Harry could have been made into a better person,” Agent Marsh continued as he began pacing again, “but now he is wanted and when he is caught, as he inevitably will be, he will be punished appropriately. As will your other comrade: Zayn Javadd Malik.” He paused for a moment as if gauging Liam’s reaction. Liam didn’t flinch although he was disturbed by how much they seemed to know about him and his friends.

“Zayn chose the wrong path. A talented young man who decided to use his skills to vandalise The City and promote the idea of some sort of rebellion against the authorities. Crimes such as his cannot go unpunished and, had he been arrested, he would have been rehabilitated to see the error of his ways. Somehow he managed to abscond before he could be dealt with but we _will_ find him and he will be brought to justice.”

Agent Marsh finally looked away and Liam let out a long, low breath. The fact that his friends were being talked about in such a way made him furious and the anger was doing nothing to relieve the pressure he felt behind his eyes. Part of him was also relieved that Agent Marsh seemed to have finished his spiel because he hadn’t mentioned Louis. Maybe that meant that the agents didn’t know that Louis was with them and the less they knew, the better in Liam’s eyes.

“Correction is not something for you to fear,” Agent Marsh suddenly said as he looked back at Liam. “In your case, and the case of your friends, it will make you better people. You will fit into The City and become useful. You will be able to live your lives in peace and you will be rid of any ridiculous notions of rebelling against the authorities. The alternative is a lifetime in a prison cell wasting away and that seems like a waste to me. However, that is the best place for some individuals – like the latest member of your gang of renegades, Louis William Tomlinson.”

The involuntary scowl that flickered across Liam’s face wasn’t missed by Agent Marsh.

“Louis was allowed to get away with far too much for far too long I am afraid to admit. He should have been rounded up and locked away long before the order for his arrest was given. His behaviour was dangerous and inappropriate and he should not have been given the chance to influence any other young people. Of course you wouldn’t know this, but I was one of the agents sent to arrest him. He slipped out of our grasp and disappeared. He has been roaming The Outside for a long time, committing crimes and clearly making _friends_.”

Agent Marsh stared at Liam in silence for a long time. He leant a little closer to Liam as he spoke his next words, “I guarantee that we will find him, and your other friends, eventually and we will make sure they are punished for their crimes. In the meantime, you have a choice to make. You can either help me voluntarily, which will be much more pleasant for everyone, or you can continue to refuse, in which case I will have to think carefully about how to make you more willing to communicate.”

Liam’s hands were squeezed tightly into fists and his jaw was clenched as he tried to contain his hatred for the man standing beside him. But still he didn’t say anything.

Agent Marsh walked towards the doorway of the room and it opened to reveal two guards. He beckoned them into the room and then turned back to Liam.

“I hope you have enjoyed our conversation as much as I have Liam,” he said pleasantly. “You will be taken back to your cell now, where you can think about whether or not you would like to co-operate with me. I’ll look forward to our next meeting.”

Agent Marsh exited as the two guards moved towards the bed. They released the restraints on Liam’s left arm and he immediately swung his fist up to hit one of them in the face. He managed to land a glancing blow against the guard’s cheek before he was pushed down harshly against the bed. His injured side screamed out as pain flared through him and he tried to curl onto his side to ease it. The other restraint was undone and he was pulled to his feet. As he stood up, his arms were pulled awkwardly behind his back and he felt handcuffs being clamped around his wrists. Then they pushed him along in front of them and out of the room.

It was slow progress as Liam’s side forced him to limp along and the constant pain in his head made him feel groggy but eventually they finished marching him along seemingly never-ending corridors. They stopped outside a metal doorway before pushing him inside roughly.

Liam stumbled as he entered the cell and landed on his knees. A guard was behind him undoing his cuffs and as soon as he was free he swung his fist again. This time he received a punch to the gut in return and he fell on to his side gasping for air as the guards exited the cell.

As he drew in deep breaths and tried to focus on anything other than the pain, he thought of Louis and Harry and Zayn. He thought that being in that cell was worth it if it meant that _they_ didn’t have to be. It didn’t matter what Agent Marsh said or what they did to him, he was never going to give his friends up. He would protect them with everything he had, no matter what the cost.

***                 

Liam was literally dragged out of his fitful sleep by two different guards entering his cell and hauling him to his feet. Handcuffs were clamped around his wrists again and he was pushed out of his cell before he had fully realised what was going on. They marched him back to the same room that he had been in before and roughly forced him back onto the bed where his arms were restrained once more. Once they were satisfied that he was secured, they left the room.

It seemed like a long time before the door opened and Agent Marsh entered. The agent stared at Liam as though he was assessing him for a while before he suddenly started speaking.

“I have received information that may explain your presence in The City yesterday,” he said and Liam thought he sounded rather pleased with himself. “It seems that someone has stolen a quantity of antibiotics from the hospital.”

Liam tried to maintain a neutral expression as Agent Marsh continued.

“Now, I have been informed that a course of medication such as this would have a very specific purpose. A person would be very ill to require such treatment. I do not believe that it is a coincidence that you happened to ‘visit’ The City on the same day that a theft such as this occurred. This leads me to wonder why you would risk so much to procure this medicine. I have reached the conclusion that one of your friends must be gravely ill.”

He paused and looked at Liam as though he was waiting for confirmation. When he received nothing but silence he continued talking. “Even with the drugs that you have managed to steal, whoever it is that you hoped to save will still require proper medical attention. We can provide that attention here at our hospital. All you need to do is tell me where your friends are and I can arrange for help to be sent to them. Your sick friend can be brought to the hospital for treatment.”

It was hard for Liam to contain his incredulity at the thought that this man actually believed he would give up his friends’ whereabouts so easily. Did he really think that Liam was so naïve? Or was he just trying to befriend Liam by making false claims about helping them? Either way, it was totally unbelievable and Liam decided he couldn’t just lie there and listen to the agent’s crap anymore. He tried to look like he was considering the offer seriously for a moment before he smiled sarcastically.

“Go. Fuck. Yourself,” he ground out slowly.

Agent Marsh flared his nostrils and his eyes flashed with anger before he visibly calmed himself. Walking closer to Liam once he had regained his composed facial expression, he pressed his fingers sharply against the wound on Liam’s side. Liam cried out in pain and squeezed his eyes shut. The pressure against his injury was eventually removed and when he managed to open his eyes, he saw Agent Marsh smiling at him cruelly.

“I am very pleased that you have started communicating Liam. You and I have a lot to discuss.” With that he turned around and left the room.

Immediately, the guards returned and, after following the same routine, Liam found himself back in his cell. Crawling onto the uncomfortable mattress on his bed, he closed his eyes and tried not to think about what might be in store for him at the hands of Agent Marsh.

***

It had been five days since Harry had come tearing back to the base. Five days since he had left Liam behind in The City. Five days that Zayn had been religiously administering antibiotics to Louis.

During those five days, they had feared that Louis might still slip away but neither of them would give up on him. They couldn’t bear the idea of losing someone else.

Harry had been beside himself when he had relayed what had happened to Zayn. Zayn had listened in sombre silence, before he shook his head sadly, told Harry it wasn’t his fault and pulled him into a tight embrace. He had feared that something like this would happen. Liam was so fiercely protective of all of them that, if push came to shove, he wouldn’t think twice about sacrificing himself in order to save any one of them. It had taken him a long time to calm Harry down enough to explain that to him. Harry had protested, he wanted to blame himself, but Zayn had just repeated the truth to him; Liam would never have wanted Harry to get hurt or captured, he would never have wanted to fail in getting the medicine to Louis, so the only solution had been for him to give himself up.

Of course, they were both devastated at the loss. It felt like they were missing a limb and Zayn didn’t miss the way that Harry would stare out of the window, looking down the road like he expected Liam to appear at any moment. They had been a team for so long and Louis had effortlessly fitted into their unit, so now they were completely on edge having one missing member and another in a life-threatening condition.

The five days since Liam had been captured had been the longest of their lives but at the end of the fifth day they finally received a glimmer of hope.

As Zayn rebandaged the wound on Louis’ leg, he was pleased to notice how much better it looked. The angry colouring of the skin around it had receded, the nasty liquid oozing out of it had dried up and the skin looked to be stitching itself together well. He washed his hands before he placed his hand on Louis’ forehead to check his temperature. With a moan, Louis moved against the touch and his eyelids started to flutter. Zayn hardly dared believe it but he gently called Louis’ name hoping to coax him into waking up fully.

Harry appeared at the door behind him to check how Louis was doing and his eyes widened at the sight of him seemingly regaining consciousness for the first time in days. Quickly, he approached the bed and laid his hand on Zayn’s shoulder. The two of them exchanged a hopeful glance before looking back to Louis.

Gradually, with continuous encouragement from the others, Louis forced his eyes open and looked at them blearily. Even though he’d been asleep for days, he looked exhausted. Despite his obvious weariness, he looked at them searchingly.

“You’ve been really sick,” Zayn told him softly. “We’ve been so worried. We’re so glad you’re finally awake.”

Louis seemed to take this onboard even as his eyelids began to droop again. He visibly struggled to force his eyes open again as he looked at them. His mouth opened and he looked like he was trying to speak but only a low growl came out. Licking his dry lips first, he tried again, “Liam?” he whispered.

Zayn and Harry both flinched involuntarily at the single word but Louis didn’t notice as his eyes were closed again.

“Just rest now Lou,” Zayn said quietly as he stroked his hair.

Harry and Zayn looked at each other and saw the same despair reflected back at one another. Their relief at having Louis awake was tarnished by the knowledge that they would have to tell him about Liam’s sacrifice.

***

Liam had lost track of time. The days blurred into one another as he had no way of knowing when one ended and another began. There was no window in his cell so he had no glimpse of sunlight or darkness. The guards changed shifts but he couldn’t keep track of their movements. They would drag him out of his cell and take him to the interrogation room but there didn’t seem to be any regularity to the visits.

The treatment he had received had been getting rougher the longer he was there. The guards had thrown him into his cell without care and hit him when he first arrived but now they seemed to have been given permission to use him as a punching bag. He was covered in bruises, he was sure he had cracked (or maybe even broken) ribs and he had felt the pain of the taser more than once. He was provided with minimal food and enough water to keep him going. The combination of physical abuse and lack of food had left him weak but he struggled against his guards every time they manhandled him out of his cell. He spat and kicked but soon tired as they restrained him with vicious force.

Agent Marsh never seemed concerned when Liam arrived in the room covered in more new bruises. In fact he seemed to take pleasure in it. While he asked his incessant questions, he enjoyed applying pressure to Liam’s bruises or pressing against his damaged ribs. If Liam groaned in pain, his eyes seemed to light up which only strengthened Liam’s resolve to not give in. He ground his teeth against the pain and refused to say anything to Agent Marsh, other than to tell him to ‘fuck off’ or call him some colourful name.

The whole time he interrogated Liam, Agent Marsh continually threatened Harry, Louis and Zayn. He told Liam what he would do to them once they were caught. He described how Harry and Zayn would be corrected and Louis would be left to rot in a prison cell at the mercy of guards who showed no compassion for their prisoners. It was almost like he got off on tormenting Liam with the vivid pictures he painted with his words. It was impossible for Liam to completely block out his evil words but he spent the time strapped to the bed imagining how he would kill Agent Marsh if he ever got the chance.

Only when he was alone in his cell did he allow himself to picture his friends. He thought of Harry’s bright smile and his laugh filling the house and he thought of the twinkle in Zayn’s eyes when he’d completed a piece of art or some particularly graphic graffiti. And he thought of Louis. He thought of his bright blue eyes rolling dramatically at something he’d said and the silly voices he put on and his cheeky smile. He thought of the moments they’d shared alone in their bedroom; the desperate kisses and the gentle ones, the soft touches, the feeling of heated skin and the quiet words and secrets they’d whispered.

He’d never told Louis that he loved him. When he’d asked Harry to pass on that message, that was going to be the first time Louis would hear the words and he wouldn’t even be there to deliver them himself. He knew that the chances of him ever seeing Louis again were miniscule and he wished he’d been brave enough to tell him regardless of what might happen. In those moments, his thoughts almost overwhelmed him and he almost let himself break down. But he couldn’t do that; if he gave in to the despair he would never be able to hold himself together in the face of Agent Marsh’s torture. Instead, he drifted away to happy memories until they came for him once more.

***     

“Where’s Li?” Louis asked as Zayn brought him a bowl of soup.

Louis had woken up and managed to sit up in his bed. He was still weak and he still looked tired but the fact that he was upright and asking questions was definitely positive.

Zayn looked at Harry who had followed him into the room. The two of them sat down on either side of Louis, their eyes flicking from one another to the recovering man in the bed nervously.

Zayn cleared his throat. “Lou, you had septicaemia. Your leg was infected and it was really, really bad. You needed medicine, stuff that we didn’t have out here. Harry and Liam had to go to The City to find it.”

Louis nodded in understanding, although he looked at his bandaged leg sheepishly.

“I was an idiot,” he said eventually, “I should have said something before it got so bad. We should’ve just told them what happened at the shop.” Louis looked at Harry as he spoke but trailed off a little as he saw the look on Harry’s face. “What is it Haz?”

“It’s Liam,” Harry choked out. “When we went to The City…we got spotted by agents and they came after us.” Harry was struggling to keep his voice steady but the quake in it was impossible to disguise.

Louis’ face had fallen and he was shaking his head slowly as though he knew what Harry was about to tell him.

Harry locked eyes with him. “We got cornered…we couldn’t get out. Li…he told me to go. He made me promise I’d get the medicine back to you. He…he held them back while I escaped. I’m sorry Louis, I’m so sorry - I left him.”

“No, no, no,” Louis was moaning into his hands as he shook his head. “Why did he do that? Why did you _let_ him do that?”

“I’m sorry Louis, I’m sorry,” Harry repeated and tears had spilled out of his eyes.

“There was no choice Lou,” Zayn said quietly. “He did what he had to do. There was no way that both of them would have made it out of there. And you know Liam – there was no way he was going to leave Harry there or risk both of them being caught and not getting the medicine back to you. You would have died and he knew that.”

“It’s my fault,” Louis whispered, “It’s all my fault.”

“Lou…” Zayn started but Louis cut him off.

“Please leave me alone, both of you,” he said quietly.

They shared a sad look before both Zayn and Harry stood up from the bed. They knew he needed some space to deal with what he had been told, so with heavy hearts they closed the door and left Louis alone.

After a few hours, Harry decided to go back up to see how Louis was doing. He knocked and pushed the door open slowly. Louis was staring at the wall opposite the bed. His eyes were puffy and red as he looked up at Harry sadly.

“Can I come in?” Harry asked quietly. He didn’t know how happy Louis would be to see him.

Louis just nodded so Harry walked into the room and perched on the edge of the bed again.

“I know you must be mad at me,” Harry said eventually. “You probably hate me and you have every right.”

Louis looked at him in confusion. “What are you talking about Harry?” he asked wearily.

“I was with him. I could have stayed instead of him. I could have stopped him sacrificing himself like that,” Harry told him as he hung his head.

Louis blew out a long breath, “No, you couldn’t. He would never have let you do that Harry. He was so stubborn,” he chuckled softly but it sounded almost like a tiny sob. “He never would have let you get hurt or give yourself up. There was nothing you could do Haz and he wouldn’t want you blaming yourself. _I_ don’t blame you.”

Harry’s eyebrows were knitted together as he looked at Louis steadily. He didn’t look like he was going to forgive himself that easily.

“It’s not your fault either, you know,” Harry said. “You didn’t know that this would happen. And…well he was mad at you for lying…he was mad at me too…but more than that he was just worried. Nothing would have stopped him going to get that medicine or making sure it got back to you.”

Louis lowered his eyes to the bedspread as he tried to blink back tears.

“He loves you,” Harry said softly.

Louis’ head snapped back up at Harry’s words and he looked at him questioningly.

“He told me to tell you that he loves you, he needed you to know that,” Harry said with a sad little smile.

Louis really did sob at that and Harry pulled him close for a tight hug. He rubbed his hand up and down Louis’ back as Louis cried that he loved Liam too and he’d never told him.

After a long time of crying and consoling each other, Louis leant back against his pillow. Despite the tear tracks down his cheeks and the redness of his eyes, he looked rather determined.

“So,” he said, once he’d got his breathing under control, “how are we going to get Liam back?”


	5. Chapter 4

It took a lot of effort for Liam to keep his eyes open. Despite his exhaustion, he refused to give in. He wouldn’t give Agent Marsh the satisfaction of seeing him completely weakened so, with everything he had, he kept fighting the urge to fall asleep. It wasn’t as though he would be falling into a restful slumber even if he allowed his eyes to fall shut; even in sleep he could find no peace. The pain of his bruises and injuries woke him every time he moved and his dreams were plagued with images of his friends suffering. The dreams often started wonderfully: he would be back at the base, surrounded by the people he cared for most in the world, with Harry and Zayn laughing and Louis in his arms, but they were always ripped apart by agents bursting in and dragging them away.

Agent Marsh had painted a startlingly vivid picture of the violence and pain his friends would meet if they were ever caught and Liam struggled to stop the thoughts invading his mind and polluting his memories.

Agent Marsh had been prowling around Liam’s prone form for a few minutes without speaking. He often just stared at Liam so it was nothing unusual for him to be disturbingly silent. Liam knew that it was in those moments that Agent Marsh was his most dangerous.

Eventually, he stopped pacing and came close to Liam’s bed. He looked down at him with a falsely pleasant smile. “It has become apparent that you are not willing to give me any information about your ‘friends’, their whereabouts or their activities, Liam,” he said as he continued to smile.

Liam grunted slightly and his lips pulled into a sarcastic smirk. “No shit,” he ground out.

Agent Marsh sighed heavily as though he was disappointed. “Well, if that is the case, there is no point in us continuing our meetings. If you refuse to give me any information, I have no further use for you. And if you insist on keeping your secrets, _you_ have no further use for your memories.”

Liam’s eyes widened at the comment. He felt his heart rate rise and panic began to bubble in his chest.

Agent Marsh turned around and walked towards a tray in the corner of the room that Liam hadn’t even noticed before. When he turned around, he was holding a syringe filled with a pale blue liquid.

“You are most privileged Liam,” he said brightly as he walked towards him again, “This is revolutionary medicine. Our scientists have spent many years developing a new drug that will assist with the correction process. This syringe contains a formula that will block your memories and allow correction to take place within a matter of hours. Once you are injected, your whole life can be rewritten for you and you will have no memory of who or what you were previously. It’s all relatively painless and your life will be so much better. You can actually become a useful member of our society. All you need to do is take a pill each day to top up your dose, which you will happily do once we have told you how necessary it is, and you will be permanently cured of your desire to disrespect authority and cause trouble.”

Adrenaline rushed through Liam’s body and he suddenly felt completely awake. His muscles strained against the restraints holding him and he desperately tried to move away from the approaching agent.

Agent Marsh continued towards him with the same sickening smile on his face.

“Get the fuck away from me,” Liam snarled as he kept trying to get away.

“This is for your own good Liam. You _are_ going to be corrected,” Agent Marsh told him pleasantly.

“No!” Liam yelled. “Don’t do this!” He knew he was close to begging, but the idea of having his memories taken away was truly terrifying. He couldn’t imagine not being able to remember his friends or his time with Louis. He didn’t _want_ to imagine such a thing.     

Pausing for a moment, Agent Marsh tipped his head to the side slightly.

“I have given you enough chances to talk to me Liam and you have refused every time. My patience has run out.” He began advancing on Liam again and Liam resumed his struggles.

The door to the room opened and two guards marched in, immediately pressing Liam back against the bed and twisting his head to the side to expose his neck.

Liam tried in vain to free himself from their grip but he was tiring rapidly and, even though he didn’t want to give up, he knew there was no way that he was going to fight them off.

When he felt the stab of a needle against the flesh of his throat, he stilled completely almost as though he was in shock. The sting of the liquid being pumped into his vein and then the withdrawal of the needle left him feeling hollow as the realisation struck him that it was over.

He heard footsteps moving away from the bed and the huge hands holding him down disappeared. He lay very still, trying to slow his panicked breathing. All he could think about was his desperation to etch everything about Harry, Zayn, Niall and Louis onto his mind. How could he possibly just forget people that he loved so much? He wouldn’t, he promised himself that he wouldn’t.

Even as he made that promise, he could feel an incredibly heavy sensation of tiredness sweeping over him. His limbs felt like dead weights, like even if they weren’t held down he couldn’t have lifted them. A darkness seemed to be creeping across his vision and his head felt fuzzy. He wanted to fight it, he wanted to stay awake but knew he was doomed to give in. When he couldn’t resist any longer, he finally allowed his eyes to fall shut.

***   

When Liam woke up, his head felt like it was full of cotton wool. He forced his eyes open and looked slowly around the room in confusion. The room was crisp and white, machines surrounded the bed he was lying on and he realised that he was in the hospital. With that realisation, he moved his head carefully to assess what damage there was to his body. He was covered with a white blanket but his arms lay on top of it and he could see his flesh was littered with bruises. Lifting a cautious hand to his head, he found a bandage fixed to his forehead. The movement of his arm caused a throbbing ache to pull at his side and when his fingers grazed the area experimentally he could feel another thick bandage wrapped around his body.

What had happened to him? And why did he have no recollection of events that clearly meant that he needed to be hospitalised? He felt a wave of panic wash over him as he tried to cast his mind back. He could remember his family and being at school with Harry, he could remember his childhood but there felt like there was a huge blank abyss in his mind where something was clearly missing. The most recent parts of his life were gone. He couldn’t even understand how he knew they were missing, it was just like something within him felt hollow.

As he wondered whether he should attempt to get up, the door to his room opened and an agent entered. The agent looked pleased to see him and Liam wondered if he was supposed to know the man.

“Agent Payne, it’s so good to see you awake,” the agent announced cheerfully.

Liam blinked at him in confusion: ‘ _Agent Payne’_?

“How are you feeling?” the stranger continued seemingly unaware of Liam’s bewilderment.

“I…I don’t…what happened?” Liam finally managed to ask, and he suddenly realised how gruff his voice sounded.

“You don’t remember?” The agent furrowed his brow in concern. “We were afraid of this. What can you remember?”

“I know who I am,” Liam said slowly, “but I can’t remember how I ended up here or…anything really.” He felt stupid and incredibly frustrated admitting it. “All I can remember is being at home with my family and being at school. I’m sorry, but I don’t know who you are.”

The agent sighed softly, “I’m sorry Liam, I should have thought about the potential memory loss before I came in here unannounced. I was just so pleased to see that you had regained consciousness.

Let me explain: I am Agent Marsh, you and I have been working together for several years for The City authorities. You are also an agent, responsible for the capture, detention and correction of rebels.”

Liam swallowed thickly as he absorbed what he was being told. He was an agent? And he worked with this man? He tried in vain to make himself remember but nothing came to him.

“You were on a patrol when you were ambushed. A group of rebels attacked you and left you for dead. It was a fortunate coincidence that you were found before it was too late,” Agent Marsh shook his head as he recounted the story. “You suffered some serious injuries, including a severe blow to the head. The doctors were concerned about memory loss but I had hoped that it wouldn’t be the case. Obviously, they were right.”

Liam didn’t know what to say. He had no recollection of any of the events described but obviously whoever had attacked him had really done a good job of it. They would be disappointed that he wasn’t dead. That thought made him suddenly feel a wave of anger towards his attackers, even though they were faceless in his mind.

“I’ll fetch the doctor and tell him that you are awake. I’m sure they will have some tests to run and then hopefully they will be happy to release you. You will feel better when you get home, it might help you start to remember,” Agent Marsh said kindly and Liam smiled weakly in response to his optimism.

Agent Marsh left the room and hospital staff took his place. They asked him questions and discussed tests they would be running and tried to reassure him that he would be fine. He didn’t feel fine – how could he when someone had tried to murder him and he couldn’t even remember who was responsible or why they had done it?

***

After a few torturous days in hospital, Liam was discharged. His memory had shown no signs of returning and he was frustrated beyond belief.

Agent Marsh had offered to take him home. They pulled up outside an apartment block that Liam assumed was where he lived. They made their way up the floors and stopped outside a door. Agent Marsh smiled reassuringly as Liam pulled the key that he had been given out of his pocket and unlocked the door.

Liam had hoped that when he stepped into the apartment he would feel a rush of recognition at the supposedly familiar surroundings but there was nothing, not even a twinge of recollection.

He sighed in frustration as he walked further into his home. The apartment was fairly plainly decorated and everything seemed to be well-ordered and in its place. There were photos of him with his family from when he was younger but nothing recent that might have jogged his memory. He had been told that he didn’t have a girlfriend or wife, which made sense seeing as his work kept him so busy apparently, but he thought that maybe if he did have someone special in his life it might help him to remember.

As Liam familiarised himself with the apartment, Agent Marsh set about making him a cup of tea. He seemed more at ease in the place than Liam did and it just made Liam feel uncomfortable. Eventually, he sat down with Agent Marsh at the table and the agent placed a folder that he had been clutching since he had collected Liam from the hospital onto the surface. Liam looked between him and the folder expectantly and waited for an explanation.

“Our intelligence has led us to the people we believe were behind the attack on you. I want to show you photographs of the men we suspect to see if it will bring back any memories of what happened. But I don’t want you to worry if their faces don’t seem familiar – it’s a long shot,” Agent Marsh told him before he opened the file and pulled out several shiny photographs. “We believe that the men in question were in the vicinity of where you were attacked and also we know that these men would have a strong motive for wanting you dead.”

Liam drew in a deep breath and nodded as Agent Marsh slid the first picture across the table towards him. A dark-haired, dark-eyed man stared back at him through long eyelashes. Only his head and shoulders were visible in the photograph but Liam could see that he was wearing a leather jacket (not exactly regulation dress in The City).

“Do you recognise him?” Agent Marsh asked after a few seconds.

Liam shook his head. He didn’t recognise the man in the picture but he could tell that he was the sort of person that wouldn’t be tolerated by The City authorities; something about the tilt of his chin just screamed defiance.

“His name is Zayn Malik. We know that he is part of an organised group of renegades that have been terrorising The City and committing crimes for several years,” Agent Marsh informed him before sliding the photograph away and replacing it with another.

This time the man staring back at Liam caused his heart to flutter a little but not in recognition. It was the fact that the man was very attractive. His brown hair was messy but it suited his delicate features. His eyes were the brightest blue that Liam had ever seen and they seemed to twinkle even in a static photograph. Those eyes combined with the smirk pulling at his lips made him look mischievous but also rather pretty (there was no other word that Liam could think of).

Again though, Liam shook his head. “I don’t recognise him either,” he said in frustration.

“Louis Tomlinson,” Agent Marsh told him immediately. “He’s very dangerous and a real threat. I’ve been after him for a long time – I will see him brought to justice though.” He grabbed the photograph, stared at it himself for a long moment and then pushed it back into the file.

Finally, he held the last photograph. He looked at Liam steadily before he slid it across to him.

There was a moment of disbelief for Liam and he actually rubbed his eyes before looking back at the photograph. In all of his confusion he actually thought he had remembered something but then realised that he had remembered that person’s face as soon as he had woken up. It was a face he remembered from his childhood memories rather than recent ones. Harry’s face, older now but still easily recognisable, was frozen on the page in front of him and Liam felt a little bit sick.

“Harry,” he murmured as he picked the paper up to look at it more closely.   

“You remember him then?” Agent Marsh asked, interrupting his confused thoughts.

“He was my best friend,” Liam managed to say. “I remember him from...well from before everything is blank in my head.”

“I’m sorry that you have had to find out about this in this way Liam. But Harry is not the person you remember from your school days.”

Looking up at Agent Marsh questioningly, Liam asked, “What happened to him?”

The agent sighed almost sadly before he spoke. “Harry became more and more difficult to contain. He was going to be brought in for correction but he slipped away in the night. I am afraid that life on The Outside has changed him completely. He has fallen in with other rebels such as Malik and Tomlinson and he is a dangerous criminal. Unfortunately, you have experienced first hand the lengths they will go to in order to avoid capture. He may have been your best friend in the past Liam but now he is obviously more than happy to attack you and leave you for dead regardless of your prior relationship.”

Liam stared at the photograph of Harry and could hardly believe that Agent Marsh’s words were about the same person that he had loved so much as a child. He remembered a time when he had promised to look after Harry no matter what happened but something had obviously changed so dramatically that they had been ripped apart and sent in completely different directions. While Harry had gone off the rails and disappeared from The City to live a life on the run, Liam had devoted his adult life to arresting exactly the type of person that Harry had become. The thought of it made his head hurt and his chest ache.

“I know this is hard for you Liam and I truly wish that Harry wasn’t responsible for what happened to you but I’m sorry to say that he is not the person you once knew. I am sure in your current state you only have fond memories of him but you must try to put those out of your mind. If you ever encounter Harry, or any of his fellow rebels, you must be able to act appropriately. And if that means killing them, you cannot afford to hesitate. They have already proven how easily they would do the same to you,” Agent Marsh told him as he took the photograph from Liam’s hand and filed it away.

Liam didn’t really know how to react to what he’d been told. The person being described was so far from the Harry that Liam remembered that he struggled to accept it. But why would Agent Marsh lie to him? And if it wasn’t a gang of rebels that was responsible for his injuries then who was? As difficult as it was, he knew that he had to take Agent Marsh’s advice and he had to be prepared for a showdown with his ex-best friend one day. Despite knowing what had happened, he secretly hoped that that day would never come.

“I can see that this has been a lot for you to take in Liam so I will leave you to get some rest. It will be good to have you back in the field in a few days and we can pick up where we left off. I don’t want you to worry about things that you cannot remember. I will fill you in on all the details once you are back at work. Don’t forget to take the pills the doctor prescribed.” With that Agent Marsh stood up from the table and let himself out.

Liam remained where he was for a long time, trying to wrap his head around everything he had found out. He felt exhausted from the combination of coming back to his unfamiliar ‘home’ and the information he had been given.

Eventually, he forced himself to move. Collecting his medication and a glass of water on the way, he padded through to his bedroom, carefully lay down on his bed and stared at the ceiling. He felt lonely, which was stupid because, as he had been told, he didn’t live with anyone else and it wasn’t like he had anyone to lie next to him and just hold him until he felt better. What was even more stupid was the fact that he felt like crying. He was a grown man who had been living this life for years but he felt so hollow and so alone as he lay there that he just wanted someone to talk to.

‘Tomorrow,’ he thought to himself, ‘tomorrow I’ve got to start making new memories and move on with my life.’ Even as he thought it, the emptiness seemed to swell inside him somehow. He rolled onto his uninjured side and squeezed his eyes shut. Even though he desperately wanted his memories back, he almost wanted to add the last few days to the long list of things that were blank in his mind.

***

It had taken a few days after Louis first regained consciousness before he was actually strong enough to get up and move around. He hadn’t been wasting his time though; he had been coming up with a plan (and a few back-up plans) for rescuing Liam.

Once he was back on his feet and feeling prepared, the three of them had decided on a day and time to launch their offensive. All of them were aware of the risks, Louis had told them that there was every chance they might not make it, but none of them were willing to give up on Liam. Grim determination wouldn’t allow them to go down without a fight. And they knew that Liam would have done exactly the same for them if the roles were reversed.

It was pouring with rain when Zayn heard an engine drawing close to the house. Immediately, he called the others and grabbed his gun before peering out of the window. He relaxed as soon as he recognised the vehicle as Niall’s car but also wondered why Niall would have risked leaving The City for an unscheduled visit.

Niall ran from his car, pulling his jacket over his head to keep the rain off, before flying through the door. By now, Harry and Louis had joined Zayn downstairs and they all looked at Niall closely as he shook himself almost like a dog.

“What’s going on?” Zayn asked as soon as Niall had straightened himself out.

Niall looked at each of their faces in turn and chewed his lower lip. He didn’t really know how to tell them the news he had brought.

“Nialler, what is it?” Harry urged him in concern.

“It’s Liam,” Niall began and he saw Louis’ whole body tense. “He’s…they’ve…he’s been corrected.” He almost whispered the last part like he was afraid of how it would affect the three men standing before him.

Three sets of eyes widened at his words but Louis shook his head defiantly. “No, you must be mistaken. We’re going to get him out of there. We’re going to The City _tonight_.”

“Louis, it’s not a mistake. It’s happened. You’re too late,” Niall told him sadly.

“No!” Louis snapped, “You’re lying! We’re going to save him and nothing you say will change that.”

“I’m _not_ lying,” Niall sounded desperate and he looked as crushed as they all felt.

“Well you’re wrong,” Louis took a step closer to Niall and his hands were clenched into fists. His whole body was shaking. “There’s no way he’s been corrected. You need to get your facts straight before…”

“I’ve seen him,” Niall burst out and interrupted Louis’ ranting.

Louis fell silent and he blinked at Niall a few times.

“I’ve seen him,” Niall repeated more quietly. “He’s working as an agent. He came into our office with another agent called Marsh to question somebody. They carted the girl away after a few minutes. Liam looked right at me and there was nothing there, he didn’t know me. He wasn’t just pretending, he really didn’t recognise me at all.”

Nobody spoke as Niall trailed off sadly. Louis was still shaking but it wasn’t fuelled by anger and denial now.

“I hacked into the security files and found the record of what they’ve done to him. They’ve used some new drug to wipe his memory. No doubt they’ve filled his head with a story about what happened to him and obviously he believes he’s always been working for them. I don’t know how far back the memory loss goes but he didn’t know me so it must be several years.”

A sob came from Louis before he tore out of the room and out of the front door. Once he was outside, he just stood in front of the house in the rain. After a few moments, he sank to his knees and buried his face in his hands as he sobbed.

They were too late. Liam was lost and it was all Louis’ fault. If Liam ever saw Louis again he wouldn’t even know who he was, he wouldn’t remember all the moments they had shared; he wouldn’t remember loving Louis. He would probably either arrest him or shoot him if they ever crossed paths again. And Louis had no-one to blame but himself. They were too late.

He was dragged from his agonising thoughts by a strong arm wrapping around his shoulder. He looked up through the rain and tears to see Zayn crouching beside him looking equally devastated.

“Come on Lou, let’s get you back inside before you get sick again,” he coaxed as he gently pulled Louis up from his knees.

Once they were back inside and Louis was wrapped in several towels to dry him off, the four of them sat in silence for a long time.

“We’re not giving up though, right?” Harry eventually broke the silence.

The others looked at him wearily.

“If there’s any chance that we can get him back we’re going to make it happen,” Harry said determinedly. “If we can get him back here and talk to him, we can _make_ him remember.” He sounded so confident that it actually gave some hope to the others.

“There’s a possibility that if it’s a drug they’re using on him, if he stops taking it, his memory might come back,” Niall said almost as though he was thinking out loud.

“Do you really think so?” Zayn asked hopefully.

“I’ve never heard of it happening before but then again I’ve never heard of anybody being ‘rescued’ before either so who knows,” Niall shrugged.

“Then we don’t give up,” Louis said quietly. “We’ll get him back – we have to.”

***      

Liam’s first few days back at work as ‘Agent Payne’ had been tough. He had found it incredibly difficult to watch as Agent Marsh questioned petrified citizens and arrested those who didn’t respond to his interrogation correctly. He found it sat rather unpleasantly with him and he couldn’t get their faces out of his head when he returned to his lonely apartment.

After the first few days where Liam had been rather lacklustre in his work, Agent Marsh had started forcing him to get more involved. During their car journeys between meetings and interrogations and visits to The Outside, Agent Marsh had started filling Liam in on the details of his past that he couldn’t remember for himself. Liam apparently had a fearsome reputation when it came to hunting down rebels. He was one of The City’s top agents, who delivered justice firmly. Apparently that was why he was so hated by those on The Outside. He had had several run-ins in the past with Harry and his acquaintances but each time the trio had managed to escape somehow. But those three were top on Agent Payne and Agent Marsh’s list for capture. Their terrible crimes and ruthless attitude, which Agent Marsh described in great detail, made them monsters that needed to be punished as soon as possible. Agent Marsh was also convinced that there was a mole working in The City, feeding information to The Outside, particularly to Harry and his friends, so that person was also a priority for the agents.

As much as Liam had struggled to picture Harry being such a dreadful person, his partner’s explanations were so detailed and disturbing that he soon had an image in his head of a monstrous individual that needed to be brought to justice. Harry’s friends were nothing to Liam so he had no qualms about going after them. All he knew of them were the stories that Agent Marsh had told him so to him they were nothing more than criminals that needed to be hunted and brought to justice as soon as possible.

Agent Marsh seemed quite keen to tell Liam just how much he had hated the three men before his memory loss. Apparently, Liam was completely committed to capturing them; so much so that it was almost bordering on an obsessive desire.   

Liam had three names and three faces burned into his mind. He was committed to finding them and making them pay for their crimes by any means necessary.


	6. Chapter 5

Several plans had been created and then cast aside as unfeasible. They were all desperate to come up with a way of rescuing Liam but they knew it wasn’t going to be a simple achievement. It was no longer a case of breaking him out of a prison cell (not that that was going to be particularly easy in the first place); now it was much more complicated. Liam wasn’t going to be pleased to see them; he wouldn’t be delighted that they’d come to save him and willingly go with them. Now he saw them as his enemies and, rather than being happy to see them, he was more likely to try to arrest them, or worse. 

They didn’t want to risk hurting Liam but they also knew that their own lives would be in grave danger as soon as they confronted him. There was an incredibly fine line between getting Liam out and getting themselves into serious trouble. That didn’t discourage them though. Nothing was going to stop them from trying.

***

The few weeks since Liam had been back at work had been a steep learning curve for him. He had become more involved in interrogating the citizens of The City and had been present at the arrests of several people. He had also been responsible for the arrests of some people which had felt strange and uncomfortable at first but the encouragement of his partner had helped a little. He was constantly being reminded by Agent Marsh that he was getting back to his ‘old self’ and that surely had to be a good thing.

After another long, tiring day, Liam made his way back to his apartment. He didn’t particularly enjoy going home, even when he felt exhausted after a day at work, because it still didn’t feel like _home_. Something just kept niggling away in his mind and it wouldn’t let him settle. The apartment just didn’t feel like it was where he belonged. It was probably some side effect of his memory loss that he felt the discomfort but he really wished he could shake the feeling.

He was about to enter the code for the main door of the apartment block when a movement across the courtyard caught his eye. Turning his head to the right, he squinted a little as he watched the tall figure disappearing around the corner. His hand fell away from the keypad and he walked briskly in the direction that the man had taken. He peered around the corner, just in time to see the man turning off down another street. Liam would have recognised the man’s gait anywhere; it was the same gangly, almost bouncy walk that his best friend had had when they were teenagers. The man walking away from him was Harry.

A moment of hesitation seemed to root Liam to the spot. Was he really ready to pursue Harry and possibly end up in some sort of showdown with him? He swallowed thickly; he had to be ready, he had no choice. Forcing himself to move before he could talk himself out of it, Liam took off running in the direction that Harry had gone.

If Harry was alone, it could be a perfect opportunity to capture him and bring him in. If he wasn’t alone, he might just lead Liam straight to one, or both, of the others in his gang and Liam could call for back-up.

Liam knew that he needed to be cautious. The last time he had encountered Harry and his comrades they had nearly killed him so he couldn’t afford to be complacent.

Rounding a corner, Liam came to an abrupt halt. Harry was standing a little further down the street with his back turned to Liam. Pulling his gun from its holster, Liam pointed it at Harry.

“Harry?” he called out.

He wasn’t sure what he expected to see when Harry turned to face him; maybe a smirk, a look of derision and defiance or maybe a look of pure evil. But when Harry slowly turned around, Liam was momentarily confused by the look of sadness and desperation on his face. For a moment, Liam could have believed that the man before him was the same boy that he remembered from his school days. But he shook that thought from his head quickly, he couldn’t allow himself to think of that boy.

“Liam, it’s me,” Harry said, and his voice was still the same slow drawl that Liam remembered, just deeper now. “Don’t you remember who I am?”

Liam laughed dryly at that. “I know who you are,” he said harshly. “I know that you’re a wanted man and I know that a few weeks ago you tried to kill me. That’s all I _need_ to know.”

“You’ve got it wrong,” Harry said desperately. “They’ve told you a pack of lies.”

“Shut up,” Liam snapped. “I don’t know what you’re trying to do but it won’t work. I’m going to arrest you and take you in for questioning. Don’t try anything clever because I promise you, I _will_ shoot you.”

“I’m your best friend,” Harry said sadly as Liam started moving towards him slowly.

 “I don’t want to hear your lies,” Liam said and he was nearly in front of Harry. He still had his gun pointed at him, but Harry merely held his hands up to show Liam that he wasn’t a threat.

Harry hated seeing Liam like this and his angry words felt like they were stabbing him in the heart. The man before him wasn’t his best friend.

They held eye contact as Liam stood before him; both of them searching for something in the other’s eyes.

Before Liam could move again, Harry whispered, “I’m sorry, Liam.”

Liam’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion before he felt a strong hand, holding a cloth, clamped over his nose and mouth. His gun was wrenched from his hand as he struggled violently and tried to pull the hand away from his face but it was no use. The hand held on firmly and Liam felt himself tiring. Every part of him seemed to feel heavy and he felt himself sliding to the floor. His last thought before he slipped into unconsciousness was that Agent Marsh was right and that Harry and his acquaintances obviously had some unfinished business with him.

***

It was not a feeling that Liam enjoyed. He didn’t like waking up in unfamiliar surroundings with a pounding headache but it seemed to keep happening to him. At least the last time it had happened, he had quickly been able to identify that he was in a hospital, this time he had no idea. It was obviously a house and he was obviously in a bedroom. He was propped up in the bed with one wrist handcuffed to the metal bedstead. He tugged at the handcuff experimentally and then twisted his body round to pull more forcefully but the restraint didn’t loosen, it merely made a loud clanging in the otherwise quiet room.

As he slumped back against the bed, the door to the room opened and Harry entered.

“You’re awake then,” Harry stated the obvious.

Liam glared at him. “You won’t get away with this, you know. Abducting an agent will bring the full force of the authorities down on you…”

“Liam,” Harry interrupted him, “don’t you remember me at all?”

Liam scowled at him but he also looked a little troubled. “I remember you from when we were children,” he admitted slowly. “We were best friends then but things have changed.”

“No they haven’t,” Harry burst out. “They haven’t changed at all. We’re still best friends. You just can’t remember it because they’ve done something to you.”

“You can save your lies and your twisted games. I know what sort of person you are and I know that you’ll try anything to mess with my head. You’re going to regret bringing me here.”

Harry blinked slowly a few times and sighed deeply, “We’re going to help you and then you’ll remember.”

“There’s nothing to remember,” Liam growled.

Again, Harry let out a long breath before he left the room, pulling the door closed behind him.

Liam leant back against the pillows on the bed and rubbed his free hand across his aching forehead. Harry’s words had troubled him. There _was_ a blank space in his mind where something was missing; he had memories that he couldn’t reach but how would Harry know that? Then, he remembered Agent Marsh’s belief that there was a mole within The City that was leaking information to The Outside. If the mole had passed on news of Liam’s amnesia then Harry and his gang could use it to their advantage, they could use it to confuse Liam and try to make him believe their lies. Well, he wouldn’t be falling for their tricks. He knew what sort of people they were and he wasn’t going to let them get the better of him.

***

A little later, the door creaked open again and this time another man that Liam recognised appeared. Zayn stood very still as he scrutinised Liam. Liam returned the assessing look in silence.

“I brought you something to eat and drink,” Zayn said eventually, and for the first time Liam realised that he had a plate and a cup in his hands. Zayn stepped forward slowly and placed the items onto the bedside table before walking backwards a few paces. His dark eyes remained fixed on Liam’s the entire time. 

Liam wondered if he expected a thank you but he didn’t speak.

“I’m glad you’re back,” Zayn said quietly, “even though from what Harry said you don’t want to be here.”

“ _Back_?” Liam echoed incredulously. “How can I be ‘back’ when I’ve never been here? You have obviously all concocted some story to make me believe that I belong here but whatever you’re trying to do it won’t work. I _know_ where I belong. I am an agent from The City and my job is to deal with rebels like _you_. Whatever you think is going to happen, isn’t going to. I will never side with you. If you honestly believe that I will co-operate with you, you are all stupid and you might as well just kill me because you won’t get anything from me.”

Zayn shook his head sadly at Liam’s words. “You obviously don’t remember us if you believe that we could ever hurt you.”

“Of course you could. You already did,” Liam spat angrily. “I know that you were responsible for attacking me and leaving me half-dead in the street not so long ago. Don’t try to pretend that you actually have some sort of connection with me because I know that you tried to murder me.”

Zayn’s eyes were wide at Liam’s words. He could hardly believe the terrible lies that Liam had been told. No wonder he seemed to hate them so much.

“That’s not true,” he told Liam immediately. “None of that is true. We didn’t attack you. You got captured by agents in The City and they corrected you. That’s why you can’t remember us. They’ve told you a pack of lies to turn you against us.”

“ _You_ are the liar,” Liam ground out. “And I will never believe a word you say.”

Zayn swallowed thickly as he took in the hate radiating from Liam’s eyes. “I hope that eventually you’ll think differently.” He looked at Liam sadly for a long moment before he exited the room, leaving Liam seething on the bed.

When Zayn made his way down to the others, Harry and Louis looked up at him hopefully from the sofa. He shook his head and sat down in the armchair opposite them. Everything in the house was old and falling apart, mismatched as it had been salvaged from many places on their travels, but it was home and they all wanted Liam to remember that.

“What did he say?” Harry asked eventually.

“That we’re liars and that we’ve made up a story to try to trick him,” Zayn sighed as he ran his hands through his hair. “They’ve told him that we attacked him. Basically he thinks we tried to murder him not so long ago.”

“That’s bullshit!” Louis erupted.

“Obviously,” Zayn said, “But he doesn’t know that. He genuinely believes it.”

“Argh!” Louis growled in frustration. “I thought that once we got him back here and once he saw us, it might make him remember.”

“We all hoped for that Lou,” Harry said gently as he patted Louis’ knee. “But it’s only been a few hours. Let’s give it some more time. Do you want to go up and see him?”

Louis looked at Zayn’s sad face and recalled Harry’s crestfallen expression when he’d visited Liam and knew that he wasn’t ready to face the same lack of recognition and disgust directed at him. “No,” he shook his head. “I’ll wait ‘til tomorrow.”

He didn’t miss the concerned look that Harry and Zayn shared but he just couldn’t do it. The thought of seeing nothing but hatred in Liam’s eyes was just too much to bear.

***

It was morning when Liam had another visitor. He hadn’t slept much for fear of what might happen if he let his guard down, so he had seen the changing light flooding in through the bedroom window.

The door was pushed open and Liam’s eyes snapped towards it immediately. Standing in the doorway, looking rather hesitant, was Louis Tomlinson. Liam remembered the odd feeling that had fluttered through him when he had seen Agent Marsh’s photograph of Louis, but seeing him in the flesh seemed to amplify that feeling. Liam felt embarrassed as if Louis would know that he thought he was beautiful and he looked away in order to compose himself. It didn’t matter if Louis was gorgeous, Liam told himself, he was still a criminal, he was still his enemy and he had still been involved in attacking him just a few weeks ago.  

Louis hadn’t spoken since he had appeared in the room and Liam, curious about the silence, eventually looked in his direction again. Louis was just standing there staring at him, with an unreadable expression on his face.

Liam shifted a little, uncomfortable with the feeling of being stared at so openly. “What are you looking at?” he asked irritably.

The spell that Louis was under seemed to be broken and his face flickered before he stepped closer to the bed. He cleared his throat softly. “I was just thinking that you must still be in there somewhere,” he said quietly.

Liam’s eyes narrowed. “What are you talking about?”

“I know you Liam,” Louis replied simply. “And you know me. You’ll remember that eventually.”

Huffing out a bitter laugh, Liam glared at Louis. “There is nothing to remember. I don’t _know_ any of you. The only thing I do know is that you are all wanted criminals and you will all get what’s coming to you.”

Louis flinched at Liam’s words. He had tried to tell himself that Liam didn’t mean what he was saying, he tried to remind himself that Liam wasn’t _Liam_ at the moment but it still hurt to hear him speaking like that.

“Don’t you recognise me at all?” Louis asked desperately. He just wanted Liam to _know_ who he was.

“Of course I recognise you,” Liam said easily. “You are Louis William Tomlinson and you have been on the run since you were sixteen. You have committed crimes against The City and you will be detained in prison as punishment.”

Louis drew in a sharp breath. He could feel tears prickling at his eyes but he blinked them away furiously. “Doesn’t any of _this_ seem familiar to you?” he asked as he gestured around the room wildly.

Liam cast his eyes around the room. He had been looking at the same four walls since he had woken up and none of it was remotely familiar. “Should it?” he asked blandly. He could sense that his words and lack of interest were getting to Louis (not that he understood why) and he was pleased to finally have the upper hand over his captors for the first time.

“This is your _home_ Liam,” Louis said in exasperation. “This is your room. It’s _our_ room. It’s _our_ bed. It’s where _we_ sleep – _together_.”

Liam’s eyes widened dramatically and his mouth hung open at Louis’ words.

“You have to remember Li, please,” Louis begged. “ _Please_ remember what we had.”

“Stop!” Liam ordered as he shook his head. “I don’t know what sort of sick game this is but I don’t want to hear it.” He had leant forward from where he had been leaning against the bedstead and was glaring angrily at Louis.

“I’m not playing any game, Li,” Louis said desperately.

“There is no way that I would ever be involved with someone like _you_ ,” Liam spat. “You are _nothing_ to me.”

He watched as Louis shook his head slightly and his face crumpled before the tears that he’d been fighting back finally spilled from his eyes. He turned and fled from the room before Liam could say anything else.

Liam leant back and wondered what had just happened. At first he had actually felt good about seeing Louis starting to get a little upset but when he saw him burst into tears the feeling had soon departed and it had left him feeling cold. He didn’t know why he even cared. But he also couldn’t understand why Louis had got so upset. If they were all lying to him to try to confuse him why would Louis get so emotional when he didn’t believe him? Unless Louis was acting, but he’d have to be a pretty amazing actor to pull that off.

Liam’s head was aching again and the confusion he felt wasn’t helping. He needed the medication that had been prescribed to him after his hospitalisation but there was no way he’d be getting that so he’d just have to ride it out. He rolled onto his side as best as he could with one arm chained up and tried to slow his racing thoughts.

***

The visits to Liam were regular. Harry and Zayn were taking it in turns to go and talk to him, to see if there was any change in his memory or if they could remind him of anything. Their attempts seemed to be futile but they weren’t going to give up, even though Liam was becoming more and more frustrated by their visits.

Louis hadn’t been back in to see Liam for two days. It had taken such a lot to calm him down after Liam had upset him, that Harry and Zayn thought that maybe it was for the best. The worst part was that Louis wanted nothing more than to go and sit with him: even if Liam couldn’t stand the sight of him and wanted nothing to do with him, Louis just wanted to be near him. Several times he climbed the stairs and hovered uncertainly outside the room, before turning around and disappearing the way he had come.

For his part, Liam actually found that he wanted Louis to return. Something inside him had felt odd since their first meeting. He wondered if it was guilt for upsetting Louis but then questioned why he would feel bad about it. Maybe it was a feeling of unfinished business between them. Whatever it was, it was confusing.

Five days after he had been abducted from The City, Liam woke up from a dream that had seemed so real it could have been reality.

He had been at a house with Harry, Louis and Zayn. They had all been happy; laughing and messing about, completely at ease with each other. Then Louis had kissed him and Liam hadn’t done anything other than kiss him back. It was the most wonderful feeling in the whole world and Liam had never wanted to stop. Until a dirty sock had hit him in the side of the face and they’d broken apart, Louis laughing brightly, as Harry told them to ‘go fuck upstairs’ with a smirk, and Liam had grabbed Louis’ hand and said they’d go and do just that. Within moments, as was always the way in dreams, Liam had Louis pinned beneath him, in the very room that he was being held in now, and was sucking bruises against his neck as Louis writhed and moaned beautifully. He had pulled back for a moment and their eyes locked, Louis’ bright with lust and laughter. “I love you so much,” Liam had declared. Louis had smiled and looked so incredibly beautiful, his lips had parted like he was about to speak and Liam had woken up with a jolt.

His heart was thudding in his chest and he was immediately aware of his painfully hard dick straining against the layers of his clothes.

The dream had seemed so real, like it was based on actual memories. Surely his mind was playing tricks on him. Maybe the amount of time he’d spent with Harry and Zayn had forced them into his subconscious. And he knew that he’d thought Louis was attractive since the first time he’d seen him so maybe it wasn’t unexpected that he’d dream about sleeping with him.

The whole thing was just adding more confusion to Liam’s already bewildered mind. He was still convinced that he didn’t know these three men but every so often he’d have this weird feeling of almost déjà-vu. One of them would say something and Liam’s mind seemed to almost flicker like something had flashed into his head but as soon as he tried to grasp it, it was gone again. Trying to make sense of it was incredibly frustrating.

***

For the first time in days, Louis was actually going to go and see Liam. He had psyched himself up for it and was prepared for Liam’s anger. He was encouraged a little by Harry and Zayn’s reports that Liam seemed to be looking at them slightly differently and they were sure it was a good sign.

So Louis found himself walking into their once-shared bedroom and greeting Liam. Liam had sat up immediately as Louis entered and his eyes seemed to be scouring every inch of his face for something.

Louis tried to ignore the searching look for fear of what it might mean. He approached the bed and perched at the edge of it nervously. “Liam, I want to show you something,” he said calmly.

Liam looked at him steadily now and Louis drew in a deep breath. He began rolling up the sleeve of his long sleeved t-shirt until it was folded back to the elbow. He lifted his arm and held it out to Liam. Starting at his wrist and travelling up his arm for a few inches there was a slightly ragged, pinkish scar.

“I slipped when I was fixing the car one day,” he said quietly. “I cut my arm on part of the engine. When I came inside, you helped fix me up.”

Liam looked at the scar for a long time before he looked back at Louis’ eyes. He didn’t say anything.

Louis shuffled along the bed a little so he was closer to Liam. He tilted his chin slightly and ran his finger across the underside of his jaw. On the left hand side, just up from his chin, there was a healed, white scar. In the sunlight Liam could see it against Louis’ tanned skin despite the stubble that was growing there.

“A piece of glass hit me when we ran into some trouble with some other Outsiders. Some bloke threw a bottle, it smashed and I got a piece in the chin. When you saw the blood, you went mad. You knocked him out,” Louis said and there was the faintest hint of a laugh in his voice.

Again Liam just looked. He felt a desire to reach out and _touch_ but he fought against the urge.

Louis shifted position again. This time he began to pull up the leg of his jeans which revealed a raised, pink wound that looked like it was only recently healed. It was going to leave a large permanent scar on Louis’ calf. Liam immediately hated the sight of it. It seemed like some terrible thing that was much, much worse than it actually looked.

“I cut my leg on some rusty metal,” Louis said quietly as he too looked at his leg. “I was an idiot and didn’t tell anyone about it and it got infected. You and Harry went to The City to get medicine for me and you got caught. That’s why I lost you and that’s why you can’t remember me anymore.” Louis sounded sad but he wasn’t crying.

For a long time neither of them spoke. Suddenly, Liam’s free hand reached out gently and touched the mark on Louis’ leg. His fingertips slowly ran from the beginning to the end of the wound.

Louis was holding his breath. He didn’t dare move, speak or even breathe for fear of breaking the fragile moment. His eyes just flicked between watching Liam’s fingers and looking at his face, trying to read the emotion that he could see there.

“I thought you were going to die,” Liam breathed out, so quietly that Louis hardly believed he’d said it. “I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you.”

The little gasp that Louis let out was enough to make Liam draw his hand away quickly. He looked at Louis in confusion for a long moment.

“Do you…do you remember?” Louis managed to ask.

Liam looked at him with wide eyes. “I…I don’t know,” he stuttered. “It might be a memory…it feels real…but…it’s not… _solid_ enough…I can’t hold onto it.” He growled in frustration and grabbed at his hair with his hand.

“Don’t be upset Li,” Louis said. “This is…amazing. Even if you can’t remember everything…it’s a start.”

Liam looked at him a little nervously. Just when he looked like he was about to say something, his expression seemed to close off and he eyed Louis suspiciously.

Louis realised with a sinking feeling that the moment was gone. Liam had remembered for the tiniest of moments but now he was back to staring at Louis like he was a stranger.

“What are you doing?” Liam asked him warily.

“Just talking to you, trying to help you remember who you are,” Louis told him.

Liam huffed and rolled his eyes like he was tired of hearing the same things over and over again.

“You’ll remember Liam; I know you will,” Louis said, before he stood up from the bed and left Liam to his thoughts.


	7. Chapter 6

The next few days were weird for everyone in the house. The visits to Liam continued with renewed hope following Louis’ news that Liam had remembered him, even if it was only for a brief moment. Harry, Louis and Zayn went in to sit with Liam, sometimes alone, sometimes all together, and they told him stories and reminisced about the often crazy things that had happened to them over the years.

Sometimes Liam’s eyes lit up and he laughed along with them, which was wonderful after the days spent without any trace of their previous relationship. He had even started asking questions or adding what he thought were memories of the events with a slightly unsure look in his eyes, almost as though he was testing out the things that were coming back to him. The others always smiled and encouraged him, just feeling incredibly relieved that he was recalling anything at all.

It wasn’t all easy going though. For every moment that Liam seemed to be coming back to them, there were many more where he stared at them in disgust or looked at them like they were criminals that he still intended to arrest.

He was getting more and more confused by the day. It was a struggle for him to know what was real and what was a lie in his head and he swayed wildly between trusting the three men that sat with him with his life and hating them for what they had done to him. In one moment, he was accusing them of messing with his head and in the next he was smiling fondly at one of them as they spoke gently to him.

Harry, Louis and Zayn were all worried about Liam. They hated seeing him so confused; at times he almost seemed to be delusional. The strain was taking its toll on all of them but they refused to give up. They could see that Liam was in there somewhere and he was obviously fighting to break free. They were going to do whatever they could to help him.

On one occasion, they had decided to release Liam from the bedroom (for more than just a visit to the bathroom) and had taken him down the stairs to show him the rest of the house. A flood of memories seemed to wash over Liam and almost leave him weak as he looked around the house. He briefly looked at the three men surrounding him with wide eyes and a look of startled recognition before he rubbed his temples with his fingers and squeezed his eyes shut.

“You should take me back upstairs,” he said gruffly, his voice thick with emotion. “Lock me up again.”

His friends looked at each other in concern but quickly did as Liam had suggested. Within minutes of being cuffed back to the bed, Liam’s eyes had clouded over and he had clearly slipped back into being ‘Agent Payne’. It was obvious that ‘their’ Liam was becoming able to tell when he was going to lose the fight and forget them again and it was incredibly painful to know that he was struggling so much against his own mind. They felt like they were getting through to him though; a little bit each time they spoke to him but it was progress.

***

Niall was a welcome visitor when he arrived at the house. It was always good to see him and he seemed to bring a bright, positive energy with him.

The other three men filled him in on Liam’s condition and Niall immediately wanted to go to speak to him. At first Liam had looked at him with indifference but gradually something about Niall had registered with him and he had smiled genuinely at his friend for a while before shutting down once more.

By the time Niall even considered returning to The City it was late and it would have been more conspicuous for him to try to sneak back in at that time due to increased overnight patrols so he decided to stay with his friends. He didn’t have to work the following day anyway so he could return to The City in the morning and no-one should have noticed his absence. He settled down for the evening with his friends, all of them taking turns to sit with Liam, before they headed to bed.

The next morning, Harry woke up to the sound of an engine nearby. He rubbed at his eyes tiredly and wondered if he was still half-asleep and imagining it but when the droning sound only seemed to get closer he sat up quickly. Pushing his covers away, he leapt out of bed and ran to the window. His stomach plummeted at the sight of agents’ cars and motorbikes appearing at the end of the road. He ran across the room and tore the door open.

“Agents!” he yelled. “Get up – they’ve found us!”

Within moments, the doors of other rooms upstairs were being flung open and startled faces were looking out in horror. They all ran to Harry’s window and peered out at the advancing vehicles.

“How?” Zayn asked in shock.

“Shit,” Niall hissed, “What if they followed me yesterday?”

They all looked at him in realisation but there was no point being angry about it or placing blame – they didn’t have time for that.

“We’re screwed,” Harry announced. “We can’t outrun them now, they’re too close. We’ve got no choice but to hold them off from in here.”

They all looked at him, and then around at each other as if hoping for someone to have another, more hopeful sounding plan. There were no other suggestions about what to do so they had to accept Harry’s idea. All of them nodded at each other and dispersed to gather their weapons before running down the stairs.

From the front window they could see the agents’ vehicles converged at the end of the driveway. There were two cars and two motorbikes, a total of eight agents standing beside them, heavily armed and prepared for a fight. Behind the cars, a large prisoner transport van was parked, and they all gulped at the threat that it represented.

They watched as the agents spread out and took positions around the perimeter of the property.

“Harry, Niall, cover the back,” Zayn ordered as he checked his gun was ready for use. “Me and Lou will take the front.”

Harry and Niall quickly moved to the back of the house, staying low as they went. The open plan style of the house meant that all four of them could still keep eyes on each other which was reassuring in their current situation.

“Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson, Zayn Malik, Niall Horan – we know that you are inside the house. This is your opportunity to lay down your weapons and surrender. You are surrounded and we will take you by force if necessary.” The voice being projected by a loud speaker echoed through the house. “My name is Agent Marsh and I can guarantee that you will not be harmed if you co-operate.”

There was no response from inside the house. As much as Louis wanted to send a bullet flying in the direction of the voice, he didn’t want to give away their positions yet.

“We know that you have a City agent held hostage. We can negotiate for his release and your guarantee of a safe life in The City without recrimination for your prior offences.”

Zayn raised his eyebrows at Louis as if asking if the agent was actually being serious or if he was just mental. Louis smirked as he twisted his finger around at the side of his head to show what he thought. Zayn winked, Louis nodded and they both leant around the side of the window frame at the same time and fired at the gathered agents straight through the glass. They both ducked back but not before they’d seen one agent fall and the rest take cover behind their vehicles.

It didn’t take long before a hail of bullets was peppering the front of the house and Louis and Zayn were leaning out when they could to fire their own shots. This wasn’t going to hold the agents off for long but they had limited options.

Between the gunfire, Harry heard a voice calling from upstairs and he realised that Liam was probably wondering what the hell was going on. He checked that Niall could cover the back by himself before dashing across the living room and up the stairs.

Bursting into Liam’s room, he found him pulling against the cuff restraining him.

“What’s going on?” Liam asked as soon as he saw Harry.

“We’re under attack,” Harry told him simply. “City agents have found us and we’re trying to hold them back.”

“Shit,” Liam exclaimed.

Harry had made his way to the window and was peering out cautiously attempting to locate any agents.

“Let me out,” Liam said from behind him.

Harry spun around quickly and looked at him questioningly.

“Let me out. I can fight,” Liam told him earnestly.

Harry stared at him for a long time. He was clearly unsure about what to do for the best. Liam was himself right now – he was his best friend and he wanted to help them and they could definitely use the support. Gunfire was still ringing out downstairs but still he hesitated.

“I can help,” Liam said desperately. “I can’t sit up here while you guys need me. Come on Haz.” It was the use of his nickname that made Harry’s decision. Liam hadn’t called him that since he’d been back.

Quickly, he marched across the room, pulling the key for the cuffs from his pocket as he went. He locked eyes with Liam as he lifted the key to the lock. He stared into Liam’s eyes to check that he was really there. Liam’s hopeful, genuine eyes looked back at him and Harry knew that he was looking at his best friend. The key twisted, the lock clicked and the cuff was removed from Liam’s wrist. He flexed his fingers a few times and rubbed at his wrist before he pushed himself up from the bed.

“What’s the situation?” he asked as Harry handed him a gun.

“At least eight agents,” Harry informed him. “They’ve surrounded the house. Niall and I were covering the back, Zayn and Louis are at the front.”

Liam nodded grimly and followed Harry out of the room.

As they made their way down the stairs, there was a pause in the gunfire. When they reached the bottom step, Louis and Zayn looked in their direction and blinked in surprise at the sight of Liam standing behind Harry.

Harry was about to speak but he stopped when he saw Louis and Zayn’s faces contort in horror. Before he could turn around, he felt a strong arm wrap around his chest and the hard point of a gun press against his neck.

“Drop your weapons,” Liam commanded.

“Oh no,” Louis whimpered as he watched Liam cock the gun, pointed at Harry.

“Drop them or I’ll shoot him,” Liam told them coldly.

The other three looked at each other and back at Harry who had tears in his eyes and lowered their guns to the ground slowly.

“Hands where I can see them,” Liam ordered and he pushed Harry down off the step but kept a firm grip on him and the gun pointed at his neck.

Louis, Niall and Zayn all raised their hands into the air and watched Liam manoeuvre Harry across the room.

“I’m sorry,” Harry moaned, “He was back with us – I swear he was.”

“Li, please don’t do this,” Louis begged.

“Shut up,” Liam said angrily. “You’re going to regret the day you decided to bring me here.”

Liam backed towards the now-glassless window and signalled towards the gathered agents. Immediately, they began advancing on the house.

“On your knees,” Liam ordered and the three men before him all sank slowly to the ground.

It seemed that the fight was gone from them. Zayn just hung his head in despair and Niall looked terrified. Harry wasn’t struggling in Liam’s arms. He just looked like he had accepted his fate. Louis couldn’t take his eyes off Liam. Surely, he wasn’t going to hand them over like this.

There was a bang as the door was blown off its hinges and they all jumped in shock. Then Agent Marsh was marching into the room with a smug smile on his face.

“Agent Payne,” he greeted Liam brightly. “It’s good to see you unharmed. And excellent work detaining these criminals.”

“It’s good to see you too, Marsh,” Liam responded. “Wasn’t sure I was ever going to get out of here.”

Agent Marsh actually laughed at that before his eyes landed on Niall. “Apologies for the delay but once we had figured out who the mole was, we had to wait for him to lead us out here.”

Niall actually seemed to shrink a little at the words. It seemed like he had realised the seriousness of his ‘crimes’ against The City and suddenly was painfully aware of the punishment that lay ahead of him.

Agent Marsh scanned the group of renegades before him coldly. “You will all _beg_ for correction after we have finished with you,” he sneered at them.

His eyes landed on Louis and for a moment he just stared. Louis refused to back down though and held the eye contact defiantly.

“ _You_ ,” Agent Marsh stepped closer to where Louis was kneeling. “You have evaded me for too long, Tomlinson. I will take great pleasure in seeing you rot in a prison cell. You will beg too – you will beg for a life in our great City, a life that you do not deserve. I might let you watch as your friends are corrected and let you see everything taken from you.”

Louis’ eyes narrowed. “I would never want to live in a place that tried to control its people. It doesn’t matter what you do to me, you won’t ever take away my free will.” He pushed himself up from his knees and stood upright. He stared back at Agent Marsh’s furious face. “I would rather die on my feet than live on my knees,” he said as he clenched his jaw.

Agent Marsh looked like he might explode from the rage that was coursing through him. His anger at Louis’ defiance was pulsing from him in waves. Without warning, he lifted his gun and slammed the butt of it into the side of Louis’ head.

Louis crumpled to the floor and groaned as he lifted his hand to his head. He was vaguely aware of someone gasping out his name in horror but all he could focus on was pain and a shadow falling over him.

Agent Marsh stooped over him. “You can die lying on the floor like the scum that you are,” he growled. He pointed his gun at Louis’ prone form.

A deafening bang ripped through the house. There was a thud and a moment of pure shock as all eyes landed on Agent Marsh’s body lying on the floor in a rapidly growing pool of blood.

Liam’s arm was still out-stretched: the gun was still smoking as he held it tightly in his hand.

Zayn was the first to react. He grabbed his discarded gun from the ground and began firing at the still-stunned agents in the room. His movement seemed to motivate the others into action and Harry and Niall retrieved their weapons and began shooting again. The agents were too slow to react following the death of their leader and they were eliminated before they had chance to fire more than a few shots.

In the midst of the chaos of bullets flying and people yelling, Liam swiftly made his way over to Louis, who was still sprawled on the floor. He had tunnel vision; nothing going on around him mattered, he just had to get to Louis.

As Agent Marsh had struck Louis, everything had come flooding back to Liam. It felt like he’d relived a lifetime within a few seconds as his memories came rushing back. In a moment of absolute clarity, he remembered everything and became suddenly aware of the situation they were in. His friends were being held captive and Louis was hurt, about to be murdered right in front of him. He had reacted instantly, without a moment’s hesitation.

Liam fell to his knees when he reached Louis’ side. Louis was curled in on himself, his hand still clutched to the side of his head. Liam’s hands fluttered nervously over Louis’ body; he almost felt afraid to touch him.

“Lou,” he murmured softly.

Louis moved ever so slightly and turned his head towards the sound of Liam’s voice. He squinted up at Liam and then blinked slowly, almost as though he didn’t quite believe that Liam was kneeling beside him.

“Li?” Louis asked and he sounded doubtful like he couldn’t trust his own eyes at that moment.

“It’s me,” Liam whispered.

“You’re back?” Louis wondered as he stared at Liam while trying to keep his eyelids from falling shut. “You remember?”

Liam swallowed back a moan as he thought about how terrible it had been for Louis, for all of them, to know that he didn’t even remember who they were. “I remember,” he confirmed. He slid his arms under Louis and pulled him close against his chest. “I’ll never forget again.”

Blearily, Louis blinked up at him and smiled weakly. The blow to his head was making it incredibly hard to stay awake. It took a massive effort but he managed to lift his hand and stroke Liam’s cheek gently. “Don’t ever leave me again,” he whispered as forcefully as he could.

Liam kissed the top of his head and carefully smoothed the hair away from his forehead. “I promise,” he replied against Louis’ ear.

When Liam looked down at Louis, he found his eyes were shut. He wasn’t surprised: Louis was probably concussed from the force of Agent Marsh’s attack. He squeezed Louis tighter and looked up to find his friends smiling at him a little dopily but also slightly warily. He returned their smiles as he looked around at each of them. The relief they felt was obvious but so was the doubt that Liam might slip back into being an agent at any moment.

“It’s alright,” he said. “It really is me. I remember everything now.”

Harry was the first to move and wrap his arms around Liam, squeezing him tightly while trying not to jostle Louis too much.

“We can’t stay here,” Liam said eventually. “More agents will come now they know where we’ve been living.”

It wasn’t that any of them wanted to leave their base. The house was not just a place to hide out, it was their home. But Liam was right; they weren’t safe there anymore. And besides that, they had made quite a mess during the gun fight and there was no point even trying to rectify the damage.

“Let’s gather up what we can,” Zayn said. “We’ll take anything useful that we can fit but we have to move quickly. It won’t take long before they send more agents.”

Harry, Niall and Zayn moved off immediately to collect what they planned to take, leaving Liam to gently shake Louis awake and force him to stay that way. He didn’t want to let Louis fall asleep again without knowing the extent of his head wound.

It seemed a little odd that they had managed to load up the cars with everything they could in such a short space of time. It was like their whole lives were being packed up and moved out. Something about it felt weirdly reminiscent of running away as teenagers when they were facing correction or imprisonment. At least this time they knew that they wherever they went they would all be sticking together.

Liam climbed into the Ford and looked over at Louis who was leaning his head back against the seat. “Hey you, no falling asleep over there,” he said as he rubbed Louis’ arm.

Louis muttered something that featured the words ‘fucking tired’ and ‘bastard’ and Liam was actually pleased to know that Louis could still string together an offensive sentence even in his current state. Maybe he didn’t need to worry too much.

The back of the car was filled with a variety of stuff that had been grabbed and shoved in, as was the back of Niall’s smaller car. Zayn and Harry climbed onto the bikes and set off while Niall followed in his car and Liam and Louis were the last to depart.

As Liam negotiated his way around the agents’ vehicles that had been left abandoned in the road following the fight, he glanced back in the rear-view mirror. He looked at the house sadly, knowing that they were leaving their home. Then he looked over at Louis and thought that it wasn’t so bad if they were all together.

***

It had taken a lot of driving around and searching abandoned buildings before they had settled on a new base, several miles away from their previous one.

Only once they had found a place where they felt comfortable did they settle and finally feel like they could actually rest and talk about what they had been through.

“There were times when I felt like I was trapped inside my own head,” Liam told them as they sat around in their new living room. “Like, I _knew_ you but I couldn’t get through this barrier that was in my head. Every time I tried to reach out, it was like something was forcing me back.”

“We knew that you were starting to remember us,” Harry said.

“I don’t think I ever _really_ forgot you,” Liam said thoughtfully. “I mean, I think you were always there, there was just something stopping me from seeing you.”

“Do you remember what they did to you?” Niall asked quietly. He was still a little shaken from the knowledge that he’d been discovered by The City authorities, and the thought of how they might have punished him for his ‘betrayal’ was still playing on his mind.  

Liam swallowed thickly and nodded slowly. “Yeah, I remember,” he said. “It’s weird that I couldn’t remember anything for what seemed like so long but now I remember _everything_. They really are evil bastards. As much as I’d like to, I don’t think I’ll ever forget what they did.”

Louis reached over and squeezed his hand tightly. When Liam looked up at him, Louis smiled reassuringly and Liam returned the gesture gratefully.

“I’m sorry, you know,” Liam said as he looked back around the group.

“What for?” Zayn asked in shock.

“For how I was. For attacking you,” he nodded at Harry. “And nearly getting you all caught.”

“Li, you weren’t _you_ ,” Harry told him.

“Yeah, but…” Liam started.

“No,” Harry interrupted. “You aren’t blaming yourself for this. It wasn’t your fault; you weren’t in control of your own mind. You are always looking out for all of us and doing what’s right for us – that’s why you got caught in the first place. You don’t need to apologise for sacrificing yourself and going through all of that just to keep us safe.”

Liam shrugged and hummed thoughtfully, but he didn’t vocalise his thoughts. It was clear that he still felt bad about what had happened but the others weren’t going to let him apologise. Looking around at his friends, Liam just let the feeling of being with them help to push away the suffering he had experienced at the hands of Agent Marsh and his men.

Much later, after hours of talking and reassuring each other that they were all okay, when they could barely keep their eyes open anymore, they all went off to their beds. Louis led Liam upstairs, holding his hand the whole way. He’d barely let go all night. When they sat down on the bed together, Louis just looked at Liam, his eyes roaming across his face like he was trying to etch every feature of his face onto his mind.

They had hardly had a chance to be alone together with all the panic of having to leave so suddenly and the tireless mission to find a new base and Louis’ head wound leaving him sleepy and confused.

Louis reached out to touch Liam’s face but his hand fell away before he reached him and his eyes dropped down to the hideous, flowery bedspread that had been left in the abandoned bedroom. If he hadn’t felt so strange he would have made some comment about it not really being their style but now wasn’t the time.

“Lou,” Liam said softly. He didn’t really know what to say. He could sense that Louis was struggling with something but he needed to give him time.

Slowly, Louis lifted his eyes back to Liam. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, so quietly that Liam might have missed it if he wasn’t so focused on Louis in that moment.

“What do you mean?” Liam asked in surprise.

Louis swallowed before he spoke again. “I’m so sorry for what happened to you. It’s all my fault. I don’t know how you can ever forgive me.” There were tears shining in his eyes.

Liam looked appalled by his words and could hardly form the words he wanted to say in response. “What are you talking about Louis?” he managed to ask.

“You got caught because of _me_. You wouldn’t have been there if I wasn’t so stupid and reckless. You wouldn’t have been captured and you wouldn’t have been hurt,” Louis blurted.

“Louis…” Liam started but Louis wasn’t going to let him speak.

“It’s my fault. You’d be better off without me; I take too many risks and I end up in trouble and I get everyone else tangled up in my mess. It’s all my fault,” he repeated.

“I don’t blame you,” Liam told him as he took Louis’ hand again but Louis pulled away.

“You should,” Louis said immediately. “They _tortured_ you because _I_ got you into trouble. You must be angry with me, I don’t blame you if you are. I’ll understand if you want me to leave.”

Louis was rambling and looked absolutely fraught and Liam hated it.

“Louis, stop,” he ordered as he grabbed Louis’ shaking shoulders firmly.

Louis stilled and fell silent immediately as he looked at Liam with wide eyes.

“You have to stop talking like that,” Liam told him. “I am _not_ angry with you. You may think it was your fault but it wasn’t. You didn’t know what was going to happen. You made a stupid decision when you decided to keep your injury to yourself but you only did it to stop me from worrying.”

Louis was just staring at him, blinking as he absorbed Liam’s words but he didn’t look like he was going to argue.

“Do you know that when I was in that cell thoughts of you kept me strong? I thought a lot about all of you but you were the one that really kept me going. I wanted nothing more than to see you again. And when they’d had enough of me and decided to ‘correct’ me because I refused to give them what they wanted, I promised myself that I wouldn’t forget you, no matter what they did to me,” Liam paused for a long moment and looked at Louis sadly. “I broke my own promise and I’m so sorry that I forgot you, Lou.”

At that, Louis let out a little sob and a tear rolled down his cheek. He suddenly lunged forward and pressed his lips against Liam’s desperately. His hands twisted in Liam’s hair and Liam returned the kiss with the same urgency that Louis was pouring into it.

When Louis eventually pulled back a little, his eyes were still shining with tears.

“I lost you,” he whispered, as his fingers still stroked through the hairs at the base of Liam’s skull.

They were still pressed together closely, their foreheads touching.

“I’m back now,” Liam told him as he drew in a deep breath and sighed.

“I love you,” Louis breathed against his lips. “I should have told you before, but I really love you so much.”

Liam sighed again in contentment. “I love you too,” he said softly. “And I’m so happy that I get to tell you that in person.”

They moved at the same moment to press their lips together again and somehow managed to sink further down the bed so they could lie side-by-side. Liam’s fingers threaded through Louis’ hair, before stroking down the side of his neck and across his back. His lips followed the path of his fingers down to Louis’ neck where he began kissing and nipping at the tender flesh of his throat. His hand had reached Louis’ arse and he gave a squeeze as Louis pressed his head back into the pillow to give Liam more access to his neck.  

One of Louis’ hands tugged at Liam’s hair while the other ghosted across his chest before dipping down to palm at the bulge that was growing in his jeans. Liam moaned at the contact and sucked a little harder at a spot on Louis’ neck. There was a gasp from Louis as he felt the momentary pain replaced by Liam’s tongue softly soothing over the spot. He felt a wave of pleasure wash over him before Liam pulled back and eyed him hungrily.

“You don’t need all these clothes,” Liam said as he tugged at the bottom of Louis’ t-shirt impatiently.

Ordinarily, Louis might have smirked but right now there was no point in teasing, he was just as desperate to have Liam naked.

They quickly stripped everything away, leaving their clothes strewn all over the floor, as they fell together again, desperately touching and reminding each other that they were both there and they were both alright.

Louis managed to roll Liam over onto his back before he licked his way down his chest, dropping kisses as he went before he hovered just above Liam’s cock. He looked up at Liam who was biting his lip in anticipation before he sank down and licked a stripe along the underside of Liam’s cock. Liam shuddered at the sensation and moaned loudly as Louis wasted no time in wrapping his lips around the head of his cock. He swirled his tongue across the tip before moving down further. Liam reached out and stroked his hand into Louis’ hair, as Louis hollowed his cheeks and bobbed his head up and down. The warm, pressure of Louis’ mouth working him so thoroughly, combined with Liam’s lack of release for so long, meant that it didn’t take long before Liam was sweating with the effort of trying to hold out.

Louis had been watching him the whole time and could see that he was close to the edge. He pulled away for a moment and looked at Liam through his eyelashes.

“Let go Li,” he said, his voice more rough than usual. “I want you to come.”

Straight away, he took Liam back into his mouth and swallowed him down as far as he could. He felt Liam nudging at the back of his throat, he felt tears at the corners of his eyes and then he felt the tingling of Liam’s muscles beneath his hand as he came down his throat. Louis swallowed around him, then sat up a little, wiping his hand across his mouth.

Liam immediately reached for him and pulled him down into a searing kiss as he tried to calm his breathing.

“I love you so much,” Liam told him between kisses.

Louis smiled against his mouth. “I love you too.” He never wanted to stop saying it _or_ hearing it. “Now, will you fuck me to show me how much you love me?”

Even though Liam had just come, he still felt his dick react a little to Louis’ words.

“I think that’s an excellent idea,” he said, as he pushed himself off the bed. They had only just moved into their new home, so the lube that they had was still packed away in one of their bags which meant he’d have to find it. He glanced over his shoulder as he rummaged through one of the bags to find Louis’ eyes on him as he stroked his hand over his hard cock lazily.

“ _Shit_ ,” Liam cursed as he turned back to his search with renewed desperation. He’d never been so happy to find anything as he was when his fingers closed around the little bottle.

Quickly, he made his way back to the bed and lay down beside Louis again, who stopped running his hand up and down his cock and wrapped his arms around Liam instead and kissed him heatedly. Liam pushed Louis onto his back as he continued to kiss him, before breaking their lips apart and shuffling down the bed slightly.

Louis’ legs fell open and Liam crawled between them eagerly. He grabbed the bottle of lube and squeezed a generous coating out onto his fingers. He leant over Louis with one hand braced against the mattress as he pressed their lips together again. Licking into Louis’ mouth hungrily, he moved his hand across Louis’ bum before his finger teased at his hole. Pushing against the muscle gently, he moved his finger slowly inside causing Louis to wriggle against the feeling. Once Louis had adjusted to the sensation, Liam pushed a second finger in, twisting and crooking them, enjoying the feeling of Louis pushing down against them desperately. When Liam pushed his third finger inside and continued the motion, Louis suddenly stilled midway through a kiss, his mouth hanging open in a silent cry. Liam crooked his finger in the same way and      Louis squeezed his arm tightly, his fingertips leaving marks where they were digging into the skin. When he opened his eyes and looked at Liam, he looked torn between absolute pleasure and desperation for more.

“Come _on_ Li,” Louis practically begged. “I _need_ you in me.”

Liam didn’t need convincing so he pulled back just enough to lift Louis’ ankles around his waist. As he did so he caught sight of the scar on Louis’ calf. He frowned at it for a moment and Louis realised why he had stopped moving. He lifted his hand to Liam’s chin and angled his head away from the old wound.

“Don’t think about that,” he said gently. “Just forget about it.”

Liam shook his head slightly. “I don’t want to forget about it,” he replied. “I never want to forget anything about you ever again. I want to remember this; I want it to remind me never to let you go, to never lose you again.” He turned his face back towards Louis’ leg and kissed his way along the scar gently.

It was an incredibly tender moment and even though Louis was desperate for Liam to fuck him, he felt an amazing sense of arousal and love wash over him at the simple touch.

“I love you,” he whispered as he stroked his hand down Liam’s cheek.

Liam leant forward and sealed their lips in a passionate kiss. “I love you too – nothing will ever change that,” he said when he pulled back.

Liam moved back to line himself up again and looked at Louis for a moment. Louis smiled at him and squeezed his arm again and Liam moved closer. Louis’ desperation showed as he pulled Liam closer, tightening his legs around him until Liam was pressing into him slowly.

It seemed like a lifetime since they had been together like this and the sensation of being filled so completely by Liam took Louis’ breath away. Liam was trying to hold himself still to allow Louis time to adjust; he was shaking with the effort, a sheen of sweat forming on his skin.

“Move Li, _please_ ,” Louis managed to say and Liam didn’t need telling twice. He pulled out almost entirely before thrusting in again. Louis gasped, his thighs squeezing around Liam, encouraging him to keep going.

Liam fell into a rhythm, thrusting as deeply as he could and savouring every little whimper and groan that fell from Louis’ lips. Louis pulled him closer, shifting his legs a little higher and as Liam rocked forward again, Louis cried out blissfully.

“There?” Liam asked, his lips brushing against Louis’ ear.

“Yes,” Louis gasped out, “Yes…there.”

Liam thrust into him again at the same angle. He braced himself on one arm as his other hand reached between them to take Louis’ cock into his hand. He stroked his hand along the length firmly as he continued to rock into Louis. The moans falling from Louis’ lips were incredible; possibly the best thing that Liam had ever heard. He could feel his own orgasm building, the tight sensation coiling low in his stomach and his movements becoming jerkier.

With a choked cry of Liam’s name, Louis shuddered all over and came. He squeezed Liam’s bicep tightly as his muscles contracted around Liam’s cock. With a few final, rather uncoordinated thrusts, Liam’s own orgasm washed over him and he came with a loud groan.

They stayed where they were for a long time. Liam had collapsed on top of Louis, his arms shaking too much to support his weight. Louis was gently threading his fingers through the sweat-dampened hair at the nape of Liam’s neck. They were both sweaty and sticky but neither of them felt any desire to move anywhere anytime soon.

Eventually, Liam pressed a kiss to the soft skin beneath Louis’ ear and pushed himself up a little. He smiled a little dopily at Louis before pressing a quick peck to his lips and climbing off him carefully. He didn’t go far, choosing to flop onto the bed beside Louis with his arms spread out wide.

Louis crawled over to him and slotted himself against Liam’s side, his head resting on his shoulder and his fingers walking across the skin of Liam’s chest and stomach.

“If _I_ ever lose my memory,” Louis began as he looked up at Liam with a smile, “Just do that to me again and I’m pretty sure I’ll remember you.”

Liam snorted a laugh, “I should hope so.”

Suddenly, Louis reached up a little to kiss Liam chastely. “I love you,” he said as he looked into Liam’s eyes. It was almost as though he needed to remind himself one more time that Liam was really there with him.

“I love you too,” Liam replied, squeezing his arm a little tighter around Louis’ shoulders.

“I hope you know that you’re stuck with me forever,” Louis told him with an almost serious expression on his face.

Liam chuckled softly, “I hope you know that I’m never letting you go.”

“Good,” Louis said with a sigh. He laid his head back down on Liam’s shoulder. “I can live with that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we have reached the end. I hope you have enjoyed the story!
> 
> I'd love to know what you thought of it - feedback is always appreciated. :)


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